By Castaway J, 2012-10-24
I was just outside thinking about things like i usually do, but this time i came to a moment of realization, something that hasnt happened in a while that i can remember. standing there on the porch looking up at the stars i was thinking to myself about how much my dreads have matured and the fact that its been well over a year. more specifically i was hooked on the notion that somehow my own development was somehow connected to that of my own forming dreadlocks. i mean its crazy to think about or even consider, is it insane to know it to be true though? introverts are though to be fair. It just blows my own mind living through the process myself and seeing the change over the last year.
By Castaway J, 2012-11-01
since that this is really the only blog that i have..ever kept. why not.. .blog. man this last year...has been interesting looking back, you know how in the moment its boring as..you know its awesome to think that this last year dreading, my dreads have been veryimmature! ive read that dreadding naturally it is always forward progress. i think this to be true in more ways than just intended. i myself have been very immature. in more ways than i can care to count...sin sity...baby. what is it when you look at things coming your way as a test? do you give in or no to temptation? hmm if your one to learn from experience and lessons learned, not mistakes, then you understand.
ONE of the reasons i wanted to take the time today and write this blog is because of ideas and considerations i been kicking around the ol noggin for weeks now. i want to move, get out, get away, leave, start over, sever all ties...though that may never happen its still something ive been dreaming about for soooooo long now................before i dig deeper into that lets recap some of this last year.
last spring early summer i got to go do some real hiking and exploring, for about a month (i wish i had six to do the whole thing) i hiked a portion of theAppalachianTrail, or the AT. This experience opened my eyes further than ever befor, taught me a lot, and made me yearn to do MORE things for myself...not just for myself, but to listen to what my hearts telling me. (i want to say that thinking with ones heart is not the same as in the head)........for years "need to get out of here." has frequented my processes..i think its similar to people who move to a new city often, like you just have this itch in your bones telling you to MOVE. anyway..ive traveled everywhere in the lower 48s, everywhere, my favorite parts are the north west, washington and oregon or maybe even norcal, and the rockies. anywhere from montana (or north if i had passport) to northern new mexico its all amazing(even passt that..). driving cross country for a couple years thinking about this "move" ive narrowed it down to these general areas.
this idea..has resurfaced every day these last few wweeks because all i see in my future is a lot of the saaaaame..im just ready to move one and progress, just like my dreads are showing me they are. im assuming my mind will remain to be boggled by this mystery of ironic timing..theres more to say..but i can just hit the add post button once more
take care and love to all!
By Castaway J, 2012-11-05
today i kinda snapped, i really do not know what made me, or why it just felt like one of the manyimpulsesi oftensuppress. I did not snap at a coworker, friend, or any animate object..i snapped my cigarette, then keptsayinim done im done, gave my almost full pack away and left!!!! that happened about four and a half hours ago!
I'mgoing to try these homeopathic chew pill things that SE recommended worked for him real wells, and i have tried them, they kill the craving.
Lets start by saying that for the last, maybe 5 months my dreads have not changed, so they have just been growing length at the roots mainly.
i feel like if idon'tfix the issue of smoking cigs and quit for good, my dreads cant and will not progress any further.i'msure they would. but honestly,i'vebeen wanting to quit for 7 years, of 14 year smoking. thats too long.
...this all is happening at a stage when my dreads are really defining themselves, becoming locked upknotsof love. when i think about it, i think that smoking the cigs is not only good for my own heath or those around me, i think about the image that the word sees. another smoking locked up hippy, bum, or whatever. dreads i believe do not want to beassociatedwith that at all!
so...from this day forth i hope to really quite smoking cigarettes, while keeping a deaded quitting smoking timeline
By Castaway J, 2015-11-28
It's been a few years me thinks, or almost, since I've been on the site. Life's been treating me very well as it continuously unfolds into more understanding of who I am and what I'm here for. If you've seen my previous lock timeline, you may not know that on memorial day of 2014 I shaved my head clean. The locks were amazing and I was deeply connected to them. However, I must say that the point in my life in which I chose to begin allowing my hair to lock was probably my darkest hour. I was in a bad mix of habits that perpetuated my own suffering haha
My first set of locks were meant to be a reminder, a reminder to stand firm in loving defiance and to keep true to myself as I go through the typical 'day in day out' mealstrom of matrix life. To recognize the flame within me, that for my entire life my 'peers' could not relate to or were very uncomfortable acknowledging within themselves. Letting my hair lock was sort of a self-initiation into my own personal discovery, a commitment of sorts to actively begin seeking my humbled power within and to fan that flame. That continues to hold true today.
So when I shaved my head clean it was a deep energetic release for me, a sort of liberation. My first set of locks, bless them (I do not know what happened to them) had served their purpose. The original intention had been fulfilled as I saw it. So I decided to release the energy that they contained, the energy from all of my negative experiences and the past from which I had come. This was most liberating. I immediately felt free, yet at the same time there was a great disconnect that I was picking up on. This can be likened to the natives that served in the armed forces of wars past, who had to cut their hair which led to the 'discovery' that their long hair had provided them a tactical advantage.
I have not cut my hair since and it has been a year and a half of growth. This set is already taking shape, and has been sectioning for months into a new set of beautiful locks formed by Jah. Again there is that parallel between the locks being formed and my own spiritual growth, but on a higher octave. Another cycle on the spiral of this life! The more my hair grows and forms into locks and the more my beard grows, the more I begin to recognize the man in the mirror. Isn't that odd?? Or is it natural?
By Castaway J, 2011-10-02
This being my first blog, probably ever, bear with me for my lack of, or fairly rusty writing skills
right now i am on day eleven of letting my hair naturally dread. the process as long as it takes, is very exciting to wake up to. right now i can separate the babies from keeping them from getting to big. this alone is fun, because several times i have come across certain locks of hair that for some reason unbeknownst to me, i just love. unique in every way, natural dread locks truly take on a personality of their own. i have noticed that since the last time my hair was brushed and looked "neat" , it has still kept that same...persona you could say till today in that the waves have separated into their own individuals, yet some how easily conform how i used to be soadamantabout. i have also noticed that there really is not as much randomness as one would think when you begin dreading naturally, but do not get me wrong because there totally is randomness lol. i notice that my baby dreads, through my movements in everyday life, actually find themselves at the roots, and then go from there. i have not found to many dreads that when i look at them have hair from an inch away of the center of that dread tangled in. not sure if it is just my hair, but i am convinced that it was meant to dread.
many changes have been noticed in not only my dreads, but my life as well. because i completely accept who I am, and what my genetic makeup has me look like, people give me many frickincomplementsall the time! it is a great feeling, and the feelings exponentiated because I AM NOT FAKING ANYTHING!!! when i used to try to make my hair conform, just to look "perfect". im over it.
by nature, i am a great listener. and i have been told i can give the best advice. but the one thing that i almost always tell people is in the end, you HAVE to be true to yourself. there is no reason why you should HAVE conform to what someone else wants if you are not comfortable or happy with it...
this, i guess is where me growing my dreads is just me practicing what i preach i guess
i thought about growing dreads for a while...and you know its funny, because things happen for a reason, people come and go from your life at just the right time to show you exactly what they have to, at precisely the right time. of course you may come to REALLY enjoy this persons presence, but at the same time remember that they taught you something that will stick with you forever. these encounters can happen on a daily basis if you are open to them. what i am getting at is that this is what has just happened to me. these amazing people as short of a time as i know, knew them, taught me what i needed to know.
you can say that they showed me the path. to take the first step was my choice.
did i make the change?
By Castaway J, 2012-11-28
Call a man who speaks Truth a fool, no matter how abstract, you only know "the truth", which has been twisted and perverted into literalization for masses, you only know to use half or the left brain, oh and they have made sure of it for thousands of years.
Have an open mind, do some investigation on your own part, and do not settle for the first search result you find dig dig then dig some more, search for both sides to the story.
Then draw your own conclusions.
Follow your intuition.
If you do not have time, then make time. It is your responsibility, it is an introvert battle we all must face but one that we all can win. Most of us have been feeling something lately, you are not alone.
By Castaway J, 2012-11-28
The Earth, mother earth, has 7 chakras; the human body has 7 chakras, and so on. Meditating and cleansing of these chakras is done just as one would meditate and cleans ones own chakras of negative dark energy with each exhale and filling it with light energy received through each deep inhale, for inner peace and balance of not only oneself, but for the world. Praying or meditating, focusing on say a natural disaster somewhere in the world, has been proven to have profound positive effects on the outcome. The effect of human thought and consciousnesss been studied in Washington D.C. for instance, one of the highest rates of criminal activities in the United States. Immediately crime rates dropped, and it was shown that mental influence can have a direct effect on ones surroundings. They say keep your thoughts to yourself, but even having the thoughts to begin with is enough to manifest something in your life youd have been better off without.
One of my favorite examples that scientifically proves that us, Human Beings, are directly connected to mother earth and her electro-magnetosphere is what they observed on 9/11/2001. I know the events make me cringe thinking about still. But what happened on that day was so devastating. NASA has two satellites in space that measure the strength of earths electromagnetic field. At all times, for decades they have been studying the electromagnetic field and have made the observation that it is weakening, and this thing is what protects us from radiation blasts from the sun and other distant bodies. Anyway, on 9/11 the whole world felt the same emotion for the most part, in turn this made the electromagnetic field of the earth spike very high as if out of nowhere. We are directly connected to the earth and her spiritual vibrations. The rapture, for all intensive purposes, refers to the earth splitting in vibrations, higher and lower.
If you know about vibrations then you know about the two basic emotions that stem out the rest of the emotions. The two basic vibrations are FEAR and LOVE. From those two emotions you get all of the others, all corresponding low or high in their respective vibrations.
The DNA within us all act as if they are antennae picking these vibrations up, but your DNA can only receive so much energy. Think of it like this, a low vibration is long and stretched out, so naturally it is going to hit your DNA fewer times, whereas a higher vibration from someone living in love is going to receive more of this positive energy, its like seeing people who have a certain glow about them. Its because it is true.
I know firsthand how difficult it can be to work at this change of character. Its been a work on progress for years. But lately the energy Ive been picking up on has a sense of urgency too it, telling me the time to wrap up karma is now, it should anyway, but some has to be worked out yourself. But the journey that I have been on for many years has only really began to make sense and fall into place since letting my hair lock.
If youve been experiencing similar things trust you are not a lone I promise. Life is great, no matter the setbacks Ive come to realize. Just take it one day at a time and stay true to your word, the Love in your heart is the one and only true currency. Remember when you fret over a bill or the economy, just remember that its all fictitious and doesnt deserve they energy you put into it by worrying.
I finished this post 10 times but kept writing
By Castaway J, 2011-12-19
who knows what the future holds. when i first started dreading, i was unaware of the gravity at which my past mistakes and failures would come barreling back into my life to test me. Having relived a previous mistake that i have to deal with for the rest of my life for the last couple months, and to which i am still getting over right now, i find myself looking for a way to get away from it so that it no longer is an option. it is really easy for me to hate myself for my mistakes the first time around but to make them twice it is even that much more worse. no one ever said this was an easy path. did i even learn anything from the first time around? not really i dont think, not when one habbit is replaced by another, so whats the difference.
ive been thinking a lot lately about going back on the road, i used to drive truck for two years, and back then i had ideas about buying land in new mexico and building on it. thats what i have been thinking about doing these last 24 hours as i have been bed ridden, barely able to support my own weight which isnt much these days. but none the less i believe this to be the best option for me. another chapter of my life is about to end and another is about to begin. at least i know where i dont want to end up.
after leaving this open for several hours, i am now going to hit submit. this was just a vague venting session. sorry to bore you