Alright so I went through several of the responses to this but haven't read them all so I'm sorry if I am reiterating what some of you said. Here is my take on it. A while back i had a class project where we had to view ourselves under many different lights in regards to race. The classifications were something like "what people see you as, how you identify yourself, actual nationality, skin tone, etc." basically all of these can be completely different. One conclusion we came to as a class was that there is a definite line between people who identify as African vs African American. People that identified as African tended to know exactly which parent/grandparent moved to America and where fewer generations in. The people that identified as African American or black have had families here for much longer and seemed to have the more American mindset. I think the longer your family has been here the more "American" you feel regardless of skin tone. You lose your culture from your homeland, wherever that may be. The average American viewpoint is that you should fit into society's views of beauty which are hugely distorted by the media and social psychology. It is scary to think that it is the same pressure that causes people to have eating disorders or be afraid of gay people or feel the need to make a lot of money or whatever else. What can possibly be such a strong force? It is the need to fit in to the small box of expectations of what you should look like, what you should do with your life, how successful you need to be and everything else. It is really sad. All the people squished into that little box get so frustrated with the people that are able to run around freely and they will always attack you for allowing yourself to be who you are. It is every persons choice to decide how they will let others affect them.
I think another issue for a lot of people that identify as black (which i cant say because I'm white and obviously everyone is different regardless) is that they don't feel as strong of a connection with their homelands as the families of Africans who have more recently moved here. When you don't feel a cultural connection to any group regardless of who you are, you feel isolated and lose a sense of identity. You begin to make your own cultural group and put up walls to keep out the cultures you don't understand, cant relate to, or feel cast out by. That is why there is so much misunderstanding between groups of people and ultimately why there is so much misunderstanding about dreads (trying to get back to my point). When you don't understand something and shun it for being different without trying to ask questions to understand it, the walls just get bigger and taller and harder to see around. Whats funny is that dreads have roots in almost every major culture because they aren't meant to be a fashion statement. They just happen naturally when brushes and hair dryers and styling products aren't forced onto people to be beautiful.
If someone hates you for being different or being yourself don't take it as something wrong with you. It is most definitely the opposite. The issue is that they hate individuality because they don't have a strong identity themselves. People that are more self aware and in tune with who they are themselves are more willing to accept who other people are as well.
sorry for the long post >_<
XD. i can see how this is especially frustrating for you though. dealing with ignorant people is always difficult, you just have to be solid in what you know to be true. its kinda funny you say they use "bob marley" dreads as a negative example of dreads, and white people use it as a positive one...
