Spirituality, Dreadlocks and Sobriety
Hey, guys. My name's Steven Wind and my dreads are about 10 months along now.
When I first started my dreadlocks, I was really anxious and freaked out about every little thing. For some reason, after reading hundreds of posts on this site, I thought that -I- would be different and my dreads would come along after like two weeks or two months, even.
For a long time, it felt like there was no progress happening whatsoever.
I started them on August 14, and by September, I started taking pills. I've had a drug problem in the past, with heroin and various other substances, and this was not a good idea at all.
After a few months of taking pills every day, I went back to heroin.
I had a few knots in my hair, but nothing substantial at all.
As my addiction progressed, I became suicidal and absolutely miserable - I saw nothing good out of life except getting high. On Easter weekend, while my parents were inJamaica on vacation, I took a train to San Francisco in an attempt to die.I've always wanted to live there, and I wanted to see it before I overdosed and took my own life.
updated by @steven-wind: 01/13/15 09:27:28PM
I met a guy named Sean and I didn't realize that he was tripping on LSD until about midnight that night, but he took me around and helped me to find a place to score some dope. It didn't happen because the area was filled with cops at night, but the next day I found some. I got a motel room and just continued to use and use and use. And I just thought to myself, 'Is this it? Is this how the rest of my life is going to be?Am I going to take my life because of my dependance on a drug?'
I had had my phone turned off the whole 3-day train ride there and the two days that I was there. But I needed help. I asked God to help me, and soon after that, I turned my phone on. My mom's text message was at the top of the many messages concerned people had sent me. She said she was in San Francisco, to please meet her.
I called her and we met up. She took me home the next morning and I went to a treatment center. I now have a little over a month sober.
Now that I've gone back to my spiritual roots, my dreads have really blossomed. My sections are pretty clearly defined (though I do have to rip some bigger chunks apart every so often) and I really do have some teenage-dreads on my head. In fact, all of my hair is full of teenage-dreads.
It's interesting that once I changed my life and am now trying my best to love myself and have a relationship with my higher power, my dreads start to really take form.
I'm glad to be sober, alive, and a dreadhead.
Keep livin', folks!