So new on "the journey" I don't have locks yet!

If you have objections or insights into why children should not be locked please share but don't do it while insulting me, you make us *both* look and feel bad.There's really no need.FYI...I rip her locks apart everyday in the shower and want to stop doing that because it hurts her and me.I am her guardian and guide.Your assumptions that it would harm her and turn her into a robot are alarming and off base, think of it this way, maybe I am harming her already by separating her naturally locked hair! IllumiKnotty said:

OMG how old is ur daughter?
just b/c u want her to have dreadlocks doesnt mean she wants them !this is her decision, you cant make that for her!what kind of freedom-lover are you?how would you feel if your parents made you their robot without letting you express yourself in your own ways?scary ..

updated by @island-mamma: 07/13/15 11:46:32AM

ive known many kids who dreaded from early ages, even birth all loved theyre dreadsonly once did i see something that kinda didnt seem right, was a rasta family and the young daughter braided 1 lil section (not sure if she undid a dread or it wasnt dreaded or what) her dad started yelling at her "we dont have plaits we have dreads " insisting she had to have dreads. i was forced to have my hair cit short all the time when young and having it forced on you isnt goodi fully support dreading kids hair..but if they ever express a wish to not have dreads they should be alowed to make that choice


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

I totally agree if she asked not to have them or to remove them I would support her, of course.Her hair is crazy corded already, I'll have to post a picture soon, all the pics I have are older or with her hair tied.Her dad is Jamaican and I'm Portuguese/French Canadian.She doesn't have typical white hair or typical black hair, not even typical mixed hair.Anyway Illimiknotty got me thinking with her comments, but not in the way she imagined, imagine that!Sooo I was thinking.....If my daughters hair is already tight ass crazy thick curls/corded/ringlets/ and I am separating her curly locks *constantly* am I not then standing in the way of her freedom, am I not conforming her by fighting her hair all the time?Freedom to have her hair naturally form and shaped, freedom from chemically laden conditioners and shampoos?Freedom from this misogynistic societies view of what is acceptable for a woman/girl?Am I making her a robot by forcing her hair out of its natural progression/state into these styles deemed appropriate by who ever?Some people are born dreads, others get hair styles. soaringeagle said:

ive known many kids who dreaded from early ages, even birth all loved theyre dreads
only once did i see something that kinda didnt seem right, was a rasta family and the young daughter braided 1 lil section (not sure if she undid a dread or it wasnt dreaded or what) her dad started yelling at her "we dont have plaits we have dreads " insisting she had to have dreads. i was forced to have my hair cit short all the time when young and having it forced on you isnt good i fully support dreading kids hair..but if they ever express a wish to not have dreads they should be alowed to make that choice

love you!!yea sure sounds like shes born to dread and being forced into conforming ti socierty painjfullyi once saw thos old couple who looked like they came oit of a normon rockwell painting ofr fresh off an iowa farm very rustic very classsic americana..till the woman turned around and u saw a sling hanging from her shoulders amnd a wide flat beavertail dread neatly folded resting in the slingit just made me think some ppl just cant prevent dreads no matter what they may seem more conventionaql but the dreads just wont be denoed and natures got a different plan for themmy sis's ex was japanese with hair to his waist if he went to bed without braiding it hed wake with massive dreads...overnight.. sometimes dreads just wajnt to fiorm so badly u just gotta let emsrry biut typos its 6 am imtired


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

Since you don't have dreads, I believe you should have them yourself *before* your kid having them so you can understand first hand the social issues that come with dreads....children are downright evil when it comes to social differences. Make sure you know how to handle these problems in a strong and wise manner before forcing your kid to deal with them.

If and when you choose to take the beginning steps for yourself and your daughter. SoaringEagle has already said more than enough for anyone to have decent looking dreads.The hardest part for some people is being patient all the while letting our hair do what it is going to do.In addition to what SoaringEagle has stated. Start washing your hair and your daughter's hair less often. Doing so will make your scalp produce less oil.You will find that a number of people here wash their hair once every three or four days. Some once a week and others once a month.Anyway, welcome to the site.

id say most wash at least weeklyu seem like the type whod know how to handle social issues but hes right u should talk it over with her let her know most people might mike dreads but some wont and might be mean about itexplain that they are just closed minded but she may have to deal with some closed mindedness and ignorance


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

yeah but dreads are forever -- she would have to cut them if she grows up and hates them. and do u know that will traumatize a little girl to cut her hair Sister Rags said:

Oh, at 2 1/2 I would definitely just allow her hair to lock all on its own, not fuss with it one bit (except maybe for having her sleep on a wool sweater).

IllumiKnotty, believe me, I understand your concern. Thing is, at 2 1/2 a child's hairstyle is still almost entirely the parents' choice, whether that be a pixie cut, braids, long and combed, or dreaded. 2 1/2 really does not have the capability to choose her own hair style, except that some little ones cry because they really don't want their hair fussed with.

IllumiKnotty said:

yeah but dreads are forever -- she would have to cut them if she grows up and hates them. and do u know that will traumatize a little girl to cut her hair

I never cut my hair growing up. my parents wouldn't let me. I was eleven when I took off around 41/2 feet of hair, and when you don't want it it feels great to be rid of it. I think if she wants to cut her dreads off she will be fine, and if she really doesn't want to have a boy-ish hair cut she can brush them out. She will make whatever decision she wants when she's ready, and as long as her parents are supportive it won't negativly impact her. The little girls who are upset about getting their hair cut are the ones whose parents make them get it done

i was forced to cut mine when young and it was always traumaticshes talking over the decision with her daughter and is being very responcible about itthe few ppl i know who grew dreads from birth are exteemely proud of that fact..and still have dreads


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1