Location: Central Square, NY
you know, forever sometimes means just for now. why couldnt someone let me in on that?
i fell from cloud 9and hit the ground very hard. all self worth, meaning, possibilty went out the window, man. trying all different methods of dealing with suddon abandonment, and steadily failing. time is the only thing that will heal emotional wounds..and its not like he really even understood me half of the time, but it was nice thinking someone claimed me. it was comforting.but constantly being looked at as a "drug addict" or "socially detremental" and constantly being reminded of people thinking such by being with him, was a problem.. but hey, ill always have that burdon on my hands.theyve told me not to hug trees, but im sure it would change the way they see, if they were to drop out, or drink some mushroom tea, maybe they could fly like i have flown..i feel like ive got these fireflys trapped around my pupils, and when they dilate, i find my self watching on the smoke curl up and dissapate the air that surrounds me.god, its such an aberrant kinda thing..why do i have to be an undesireable?why do i have to be alone and misunderstood.i mean yea, i have myself, but sometimes the walls of my mind get smaller and smaller and i feel trapped.if i could just find the one who can unlock my soul.my mind.love taught me nothing but bleak lessons.lessons none the less i suppose.emotionally and mentally disoriented.but lookin up at the sky and feelin thats its going to be alright either way because the sunshine moon and stars are always there for me to confide in.
i understand your disapointment even your dissorientation feeling lost after a loss like thatyou tied all your lifes expectations to another, that i found is the mistake instead you should live your lifes dream and when asnother comes along share that with them, but not depending on them to be there forever untill they prove they can be..your happinessmust come from what you do not from another.. when u acheive the life you want then you can share it happily.