Help me avoid medications
So here's the short of it. I've dealt with depression on & off it seems since I was 15ish. I hit an extremely low point before we moved here (a bit over 5 years ago) I was dealing with it all by natural methods at that point (exercise, omega 3, vitamin D & St. Johns Wort) when we moved I stopped it all & the move was out of a bad situation so that really helped for a while just getting out of that. It didn't seem to get really bad again until after the birth of my second child I took a dive & haven't recovered. Now I'm pregnant with our third, pregnancy makes me very ill (Hyperemesis Gravidarum) & each pregnancy has gotten worse. This one has been particularly difficult because it's been worse, I have the other two children to take care of, I wasn't recovered emotionally yet, there has been the added stress of moving out of our apartment & buying a house (which was going smoothly until the bank screwed us over by making a mistake, we almost lost out on the house & $1,700 but we were able to find a different lender & work it out but we still lost $370 that we were in need of), my mother is a constant pain for me (she tends to think she's helping me, but really shes only helping herself & driving me insane), & my husband has brought up that this should be our last baby since it's been so hard on me & our family (& we can't afford some sentimental things for the pregnancy/birth that I've always hoped for, small beans but still makes me emotional over it, plus we always wanted a large family 6-10 children & now i feel like i'm losing out on that as well, & not knowing this would be our last i've been suffering through the whole thing & haven't been able to enjoy or savor any of it.) I want this baby but don't feel bonded, I've felt just sick the whole time, not pregnant (hard to explain really).
We've finally decided we have to DO something, it's not just getting better & I have to do something now so it doesn't spiral downwards after the baby is born. I know I can't handle it getting much worse, it's already affecting me so much. The problem is I'm afraid if I see someone all they are going to do is push medications on me & I prefer to avoid those not only for my body normally, but for the baby I'm carrying & intend to nurse. Exercise & eating options are hard to manage since I'm so sick nothing stays down & I'm so weak a lot of days I can barely lift myself. I'm at a loss. What can I do?