yeah it took a while of "oh there is something" "damnit it washed out" before something finally stuck. i finally found a loop/knot & waited 3 days til my wash day & it stayed so I considered it finally "official" that it was there to stay

now that little loop/knot has changed daily & been sucking in surrounding loose hair & is seeming to shrink & mat up just slightly (but better than nothin!) there was nothing else going on but him until just lately now i'm starting to get some baby loops near the roots on the very top where my part is & they just seem to be building (almost 8 months now). they are still coming along slowly but always so lovely. enjoy the path, love your hair no matter what it does or doesn't do, just have fun letting em be free & not caring.

Haha. OK, well I'll go back to the neglect method, and shake it dry. I didn't have any knots from the prior 5 months of neglect. Any "dread" that had formed was just rinsed away every time I washed. When I banded the roots, that was the only thing that made the hair kinda look like dreads. I have since cut out all of the rubberbands. I guess I was thinking it would take a few weeks, and once it started turning into month after month, I definitely got anxious and wanted them to just be there already. That's why I let her talk me into backcombing. Well, such is the process of getting the physical while working on the emotional.

actually use the towel on the floor so when you drip you don't wipe out hahah (i learned that the hard way DOH!)

if you already backcombed just leave them go from here (just wash & separate, the backcombing is a starter method & does not need to be repeated). the backcombing probably undid any knots that you had started from neglect, but it's okay they will reknot from here & be fine. If you are determined to have natural you can comb them out & let them restart naturally.

Skip the towel for sure, just shake & go. Do as minimally invasive washing & drying as possible (very little/no touching)

So, do you think I should just go back to neglect completely? Or should I tnr? Are they going to totally come unraveled because I backcombed?

tnr-twist and rip

way better then backcomb

id skip the towel shake em out then drip

For drying, I would just put my hair in a towel to catch the majority of the water, and then let them air dry. I'd only wash in the morning so they'd have more than enough time to dry before bed.

Soaring Eagle, what is tnr?

shes an idiot a lil wax is way too much wax and wax will only make them stiffer and stick up longer

put on a hat a few hours or wait a week it will lay down

backcomb always looksredicyulouse if u used tnr instead theyd look fine

the rubber bands hurt u not help u

and it was most lilely the washing technique as well as drying that was slowing things

washing helps knots form, i would suggest washing maybe 2-3 times a week. sometimes it can take a while. Mine took 6 1/2 months to form the first knot. Slow progress is still progress, & it's so rewarding when you can finally SEE things. Just forget about your head & live your life, the hair will take care of itself given time. Never ever use wax. Wax will do more harm than good & it doesn't help your hair knot at all, itjuststicks it together to give an illusion of knotting/dreads. I would recommend against the rubber bands as well, they can get stuck & melted & cause weak spots. Try using some beads or maybe even wraps. & more time. It will get there, sometimes our journeys just take longer than others.

Never use wax. even a little bit. Wax stops hair from locking. It glues it together. It give the impression of locks, but doesn't actually do anything. Plus, no matter how little you use, it doesn't wash out. Not in normal washes. You have to seriously scrub it with a detergent to get it out. Wax is a hydrocarbon. It needs a detergent to break it down. I could go into the science of it, but it'll be hard without pictures. Just believe me, soap won't washout wax.

Bands ruin your hair. If you feel like you must use them at all, only band the tips when you shower and take them out when you are done. Don't leave them in for more than a few hours. Especially the ones at the roots cause weak spots and will hurt your progress. Not to mention that the ones at the roots are the ones that get lost in your hair. They get sucked in and dry rot inside a lock. Which leads to mold.

How are you drying? That may be what's taking so long. But honestly, there are a thousand and 1 factors that go into how your locks progress and form. It took me a full year to see any progress at all. some people see it in a few weeks. Some see knotting in a few hours. We're all different. Embrace the process. Locks teach you about patience and self control. You can't force them to happen without hurting them.

Talk to Ixchel. She has pretty straight hair, and it's taken her a while to see progress. But once it started, it really took off. Hit her up and take a look at her timeline. It may be close to what you're going through