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shaina

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Location: Allentown, PA
Zipcode: 18109
Country: US

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lame affects of the journey.

2012-08-09
By: shaina
Posted in:
So this is lame, I've had a "boyfriend" for two years and since I've decided to make the transition into natural dreadlocks he's been extremely persistent about leaving me if I continue this journey. I really am caught in the middle as this to me is amazing and strange and only hair and something I want to try but he's clearly shallow and claims they're dirty and smelly and I look lazy. Some advice pleaseeeeee
Valérie
08/12/12 11:31:57PM @valrie:

You are more than the sum of other peoples desires.

You will need to take this seriously because I can understand that you would want to give an inch for the life you have been living for 2 years now however, if you give on this will it stop there? I'll bet dollars to donuts something else that he doesn't like will crop up and the threats will come again until you change.

Have you talked to him about this seriously? I do mean, sit down and tell him how shallow he is being and explain to him that you don't have dirty hair and how you feel about this process as well as how he is acting about this? Because honestly, if he cares about YOU at all then he would be willing to look past this (regardless of him not liking it.)


Keith Kelley
08/12/12 11:05:58PM @keith-kelley:
He doesn't understand the freedom you obtain when you stop trying to control every little thing in your life. He's gotta find that out for himself before he can be happy with anyone. And each person discovers it differently. For us its the journey to dreads, for him it might be something else. Anyway im just sayin it's not you, its him.

TJ Murphy
08/09/12 10:21:13PM @tj-murphy:
So sorry for someone so close to be so insecure. You'll find better out there. Don't let anyone change you, change as you want.

shaina
08/09/12 07:12:48PM @shaina:
Never looked at it that way but you are 100% correct. It to me is like an experiment and a really neat experience. My personality will always be the same, I'm just as hesitant. I really appreciate you're support. :) thank you again.

☮ soaring eagle ॐ
08/09/12 07:07:06PM @soaring-eagle:

sounds like a manipulative control freak

i dont like em o ill use emotional blackmail to hget my way..not cause it matters but just cause im the guy and i get what i want or else..

dreads are awesome for teaching you whos really worthwhile in yoir life

imagine if instead of growing drads u burned your face or lost a leg would u want him to leave you cause u lost or gained weight do to illeness?

superficial shallow jerk u can do much better


shaina
08/09/12 06:48:53PM @shaina:
Thank you for the advice, I sent him numerous pictures and videos of beautiful women that wear them proudly. I agree I want to experiment. I'm going to continue! :) if he goes its fine he's just not creative enough for me! Thank youu!

Baba Fats
08/09/12 06:34:57PM @baba-fats:

Leave him. If you told us that he was hesitant about them, and that he just thought they were dirty and smelly, I'd tell you to stay and show him that they're not. Show him how you wash them regularly and that they actually need some care.
But the fact that he's threatening to break up because of it, shows that he will probably break up anyway for something else he doesn't approve of. Your locks are just the reason he's giving you right now.

Get out of a potentially draining relationship before it takes a toll on your mental health. Anyone who wants to be with you, will be able to learn to like your locks, or at least like you because you like having them


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