Today was a little rough. I had two confrontations about dreading my hair. One was from a cousin, with whom i have been extremely close for a very long time. She expressed genuine disapproval of my decision and told me that she loved my hair the way it was and wished I weren't changing it. She's not the first person who hasn't been fond of the idea, but because of the importance of my relationship with her, the concern was more troubling coming from her. No one wants their friends to disagree with their decisions. But, I told her exactly what I've told other people. It's not her hair, it's not her choice. I value her opinion, but at the end of the day, it's something I have to live with, and something I DO want. Very badly, asI'm discovering.

Another confrontation was from my dad. He has been gone for 2 weeks and is coming home tomorrow. I started to naturally let my hair dread while he was away. He also was unimpressed with my decision, andbasically expressed his concern that people will think of me differently, and that it will say something bad about me. But I am choosing to take an Aristotilian view on this skepticism about my decision, and amdismissing it. Aristotle believed that if someone was skeptical of his work, it was simply because they were not designed to understand it, similar to how the deaf were not designed to listen to music, and the colorblind could not possibly understand (to a full extent) the difference between blue and red. It very well may be hopeless to try to get Dad to understand why I'm making this choice, and I'm ok with that. Convincing him of my choice is not crutial in any way to me making it.

I was told that dreads teach you lessons, a major one being patience. But, I've only been dreading for about a week or so and they've already taught me something different. Respect for myself, for my decisions, for who I am and who I want to be. They are teaching me to believe in myself. To believe in the power of my mind and my body, and my will.

For a while, I was a little uncertain about dreading my hair. Then I started, and wondered if Dad would tell me to stop and if so- how would I respond? I wasn't sure what the answer to that question may be. But I know now. Nothing and no one can change my mind, nothing will stop me. No comment from friends, no threat from my father. This decision is mine. I make it for myself. Not in spite of anyone, and not for anyone else. This is for me.

Alright. I'm going to do it. Today is technically day 2 of not brushing but day 1 of consciously not brushing. I have had the 3 I backcombed for almost 3 weeks, but after I took the rubber bands out they began to unknot a little and loosen up. I am going to let them do their thing though. They can figureit out naturally, along with the rest of my head.The only thing that backcombing/rubber bands did was speed up the process, but I'm afraid that if I try to do that, then I will miss out on so much of the experience of letting my hair dread. I figured that if I've been spending this much time thinking about dreading, then thats probably a sign that I'm ready. I was going to wait a little while to be absolutley sure, but I know that if I wait 2 or 4 or 6 months I will still want to, so I might as well get started now. I'm going to let my hair naturally dread, since that seems to obviously be the best way. (any one catch the oxymoron there?) I plan to wash my hair every 4 days-1 week, and am going to use a residue-free neutrogena shampoo until i can get my hands on the ingredients to make my own wonderful concoction with which to wash my hair/dreads. As I understand, to naturall dread my hair, besides slightly lengthening the time between washes (currently 3-4 days- I don't wash my hair super often anyway, so it won't be a drastic change for me), there really isnt that much else to letting it naturally dread. Besides not brushing my hair, clearly. I think/hope it will still be ok for me to wear my hair in a bun several days of the week, as I do now. If not I'd love someone to tell me so. Other than have my hair look like a crazy mess until the dreads form and organize, I have no reservations about taking this plunge. Worst case scenario-I decide I don't want them anymore. In which case, if I'm too far along to brush them out,it is already on my bucket list to shave my head, so that deciding I don't want dreads anymore might not be that bad of a scenario.

Well, here I go! Can't wait for all the lessons and experiences this journey will bring : )

So my 3 dreads that i backcombed have started to un-knot a little and I'm ok with that. I'm just going to let them naturally dread and go at their own pace.

I'm still thinking about doing the rest of my head. I'm a little scared though. I will convince myself that I want to then have even the slightest shade of doubt and wonder how valid those doubts are. I keep telling myself that I can always start dreading later on but ifI start before I'm sure than there's not really any taking that back. But when I'm thinking I do want to do it, I REALLY want to do it. I wonder why I haven't started already. I think that dreads are beautiful but I also think that my hair is beautiful the way it is now. Any advice? (besides "just do it" haha)

So today is the 5th official day of my dreading journey. I backcombed the first three dreads and don't plan to do the rest of my head for around 9 months or so. I plan on doing it naturally though when I do. For now, I've kind of continued to backcomb a bit. I've only washed my hair once since I started my dreads. I'm still not really exactlysure how I'm supposed to wash them. I've also got rubber bands around my roots area because I was told that would help the roots tighten faster.

I don't think theres too much maintanance I really HAVE to keep up with, if I'm right.

I'm pretty excited to really have my dreads start doing their thing. Most people that I've asked have said that dreads suit me and that they'll look really natural on me. I can't wait to really find out that this is true : )