to dread or not to dread, that is the question, things to concider before taking the plunge
I hate hearing "You used to be so beautiful", "You would be so pretty IF..." all regarding my dreadlocks. It comes mainly from my family, which is hard to deal with. I wish I had the audacity to tell them that they would be beautiful if they didn't have such condescending and judgmental views, especially regarding MY aesthetics.
If anything, my dreads make me feel prettier than when I didn't have them. I don't have to do anything with my hair, they can be all over the place crazy and I still look at the mirror and love them.
I don't think my hair has ever been healthier. I enjoy not having to detangle it to fit in with "normal" female society, or flat iron it, or fill it full of silicone products. I pay attention to what I put in my dreads, and that it a change I am happy with. I'm becoming interested in learning how to make my own shampoos and soaps.
I'm sorry to sound basic but there is just no other way to describe this besides perfet
My mom is great. We didn't always get along so well mostly because of my anti-authoritarian nature and y father being an ex-cop.
I pretty much let them know a long time ago that they could either take me for who I was or they wouldn't see me around.
For a long time they had to watch me be a junkie and our relationship was obviously a mess. When I found myself and became healthy and started being responsible and helping others, they started to understand me and all my choices. They see how happy I am in my life and they don't have to worry about me.
Now they support me and they don't care about stupid superficial things like hair or clothes.
I think parents who seem to be closed minded and controlling are very afraid. The media puts fear into the public and tries to create this sheepism we see everywhere. The parents think it is safest to fit in to what is acceptable.
In my experience, if you can show them that you can take care of yourself while being your own person they tend to forget about the nonsense stuff. On the other hand, if you are living at home, cant hold a job, not taking care of yourself, you will only feed their fear. Then they will push you harder and harder to conform so, in their eyes, you won't end up in a really bad situation.
This whole society is based on fear. Even the "green movement" and NRDC and the "liberal" democrats, and the animal rights people, are pushing fear and negativity to get what they want. We need posotive examples and joyful individuals to change things or else things will always be the same.
If you want people to accept you for who you are you have got to take the responsibility to show that you can stand on your own feet and be happy with your own choices.
soaringeagle said:mothers...they gotta constantly nag and find fault
its annoring but u learn to tune it out or learn to laugh at it