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Dread Insecurity

Jewel
@jewel
5 years ago
2 posts

So I've had my dreads for about a year now. As much as I hate to admit it, I still feel pretty insecure about them a lot of times. Does anyone else experience this / has experienced this? If so what did you do to get over it? Do you still have dreads? Do you still have those feelings?


updated by @jewel: 02/14/15 08:21:12AM
☮ soaring eagle ॐ
@soaring-eagle
5 years ago
28,054 posts

stop caring

dreads arent a contest you dont gotta compare your dreads to others why be insexcure about what your hair does when you just let it do its thing

how can it go bad when its just doing what it wants to do

for the record they look good

ive had mine almost 22 years and if they did look bad so what i wouldnt change a thing id keep em anopther 22 years




--
Creator and head dreadhead at:
Dreadlocks Site
Glider pilot student at:
Freedoms wings international
Tara C
@tara-c
5 years ago
645 posts

It's just your own individual state of mind. I mean, I'm 8 months into dreading and I'm not insecure about them at all, and that's saying a lot because I'm a person with low self-esteem. They make me feel more confident and free, so...find out what the cause of your insecurity is, and address it, work on improving your mentality towards it.

Tied up in knots
@tied-up-in-knots
5 years ago
205 posts

Insecure about them simply being dreads or insecure comparing your dreads to other dreads?

Not that it really matters, it all boils down to embracing yourself.

Before I had dreads I was way more insecure than I am now. I'm still insecure but not about my hair! I wake up in the morning, look in the mirror, and see ME. The me I always wanted to be. The me that was inside wanting to break out. I take that feeling with me all day. Fuck the haters. They're the ones that made me insecure in the first place. I'm taking my thunder back!

One thing to remember. We all have opinions. We all have ideas on what we find aesthetically pleasing. The thing that divides nice people and assholes is whether and why those opinions are shared.

Why should I care if some middle aged, bleached blonde, botoxed, soccer mom driving a mini van and wearing crocs thinks my hair is gross? I think her choices are gross. I'm just nice enough not to say it to her or treat her any differently because of it.

Of course I do reserve the right to lay down the judgement if someone decides I need to hear their opinion. Tit for tat my friend.

And not that it matters in the slightest! but it is my opinion you should keep rocking those dreads.

☮ soaring eagle ॐ
@soaring-eagle
5 years ago
28,054 posts

also perception

you choose to listen to who u choose to listen to

i remember on another forum 1 kid posted a am i ugly discussion he got 500 no your noyt responces ..which he ignored then 1 sarcastic idiot said yes your the ugliest person i ever saw.. that was the only 1 he respondded to..only comment he paid any attention to and took seriusly

when u dread u get negative responceds these should make u stronger unles u let em make u weaker

u will get 10000 positive responces for every negative..but who do u listen to who do u let affect you

instead of letting 1 bring u down let 1000 hold u up

your dread look amazing

take it from all of us your dreads are great

and just ignore the rest that say otherwise




--
Creator and head dreadhead at:
Dreadlocks Site
Glider pilot student at:
Freedoms wings international
Tied up in knots
@tied-up-in-knots
5 years ago
205 posts

Exactly S.E.!

What gives negative opinions so much power over the positive? Forget the negative. So people don't agree with you or your choices...do you agree with theirs?

Should my friend stop being Christian because I am an atheist and think religion is ridiculous? Should my mother stop bleaching her hair because I think natural beauty is more beautiful than manufactured? Should my husband stop listening to dubstep because I think it is a cancer on the ears? Nope. My opinions don't make me right. They just make me different.

Focus on the positive. The negative doesn't matter. You will NEVER make everyone happy so why even try? Find your own happiness first and then work on pleasing others.

☽ Jasper ☾
@jasper
5 years ago
29 posts

Tara that was a wonderful response.

Sussi
@sussi
5 years ago
85 posts

So much wisdom in this thread!

I love the way my dreads make me feel. The otherdaythis woman was looking at me on the train and I could tell that she disapproved of meand my hair.That just made me feel rebelious and strong and superior to her. I kind of felt sorry for her in her perfect outfit, perfect make-up and "perfect" hair. I bet she could never leave her house with out her perfect appearance, that's insecurity.

I believe that most people don't think too much about how other people look because they are busy worrying about themself. If I ever feel insecure that thought helps me. :-)

Circle Dancer
@circle-dancer
5 years ago
121 posts

I think you are very beautiful. And I second someone's question earlier, are you insecure about having dreads? Or about how yours look?

Personally I never feel insecure about mine. But I was a pretty confident girl before I got them too... I've always worn the same clothes over and over for weeks and gone out in sweatpants all the time and just basically been this freak when it comes to "normal" society so I just don't really give a crap what others think... at the same time I feel really hot and sexy and beautiful being how I am, and kinda like Sussi said, I actually feel sorry for women who feel the need to conform so much to what society decides is 'good looking'. I feel incredibly lucky to be so free, you should too!

Heather
@heather
5 years ago
1,294 posts
I'm very insecure about my hair. I've spent my life just blending in and basically invisible most of the time. A plain Jane of sorts. Now that I have crazy hair I find I get way more attention than I'm comfortable with. And so far it's been all negative:/ I find myself thinking about brushing out my hair quite often just to avoid this backlash but then I feel like that would be them winning. I wear hats a lot when I go out so people wont see my hair. I still have family and friends that have no idea about my dreads because I hide them whenever they come around. I just don't want anymore judgments made about me.Wow, this is absolutely no help at all to you. Lol! You and your dreadlocks are lovely:)
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