Loosening and sometimes all-out unraveling is totally normal and expected with dreads that were made by backcombing and TnR. Using those methods only gives your hair a sectioning guideline to follow (if it so desires.) Once it all loosens up it will start to reform and lock on it's own. While it's doing this the hair will look crazy and wispy and a lot of people seem to develop a love/hate relationship with it. In fact, my hair is at 2 months old as of tomorrow and it looks really crazy.
Vaseline, like wax, is a hydrophobic substance -- it repels water. Think about it like this, if you put a spoonful of either of those 2 substances in a cup and add water to it and shake it up... will it disappear or still be there? You only want to put something that will be water soluble in your hair otherwise it will just build up with each application making a nice environment for future mold production.
So, as Baba recommends, I also recommend doing a "wax removal" so that the Vaseline is stripped from you hair. If you can do it, get the gel he mentioned too. Use it sparingly, like when you have to go to dinner with the family or have an interview and when you don't need your hair to be perfect then just let all the loose ends and wispy bits free because they need to move around in order to find a dreadlock to get sucked into or form.
Should wash about 3 times/week with a non-residue regimen (there are a few that are recommended on this site by various members so you need to find one that works for you, if you haven't yet) and then separate the locks as needed when they start to grow together. Before you do the washings you can spray your hair with a sea salt spray and this can help roughen up the hair and put a little boost to your dreading. aside from those things, you don't really need to do anything else. I bet if you get the Vaseline out and start going residue free then you will see a major difference over the course of the next month in regards to progress.