just need some unbiased advice :)

So this doesn't have anything to do with dreads, but i just recently wrote a book and am about ready to make it available to buy on amazon. I have something set up online so people can review half of the first chapter, and it's been up since january. I thought i would be good at taking critisism but last night somone rated it and was kind of mean about what they had to say. I'm trying really hard not to let it bother me, because i love my book and my new motto is to be happy no matter what obstacles i have to face, but they seemed to have hit every nerve and every worry i've ever had about my book. i was just looking for some advice from people i don't know. I felt like my friends were baby-ing me when i brought it up to them. I don't want that cuz it makes me feel worse. I'm just lookin for some advice from people who might have some experience in being critiqued on something they love and how to handle it without letting it put a damper on everything. Any and all advice is much appreciated
updated by @jessica-acosta: 01/13/15 08:59:45PM

u got a book on sale on amazon they dont..you win

mean ppl are mean u cant help that

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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

ahahah oh i'm gonna whip my hair back n forth thanks for your advice! i knew there would be people who don't like it cuz it's kind of directed at a certain audience. it was just an initial reaction to be defensive about it, but i feel better now. if i think their constructive critisism is justified, i'll learn from it, but if it's not i'll learn to disregard it thanks again!
Personal Jesus MD said:

Well if you feel good about the work you put into a book its all good if others dont like it thats them they can chose not to buy or not at the end of the day somebody is going to buy it and if not then hey you tried most people dont write books

:P just whip your hair back and forth

very true. i never thought of it that way. thanks! mean people can be a drag

soaringeagle said:

u got a book on sale on amazon they dont..you win

mean ppl are mean u cant help that

thank you so much! xD i knew there would be negative opinions out there, i just thought i would be better at dealing with them. but i'm gonna try the best i can to either learn from constructive critisism or disregard it, depending on if what they say is justified or not. It's gonna be hard to get over the initial reaction tho. no one wants to hear bad things about something they worked so hard on. but it's all a process! thanks again for your advice. it is much appreciated
fancyAmanda said:

Well first of all I give you major kudos for writing a book and putting it out there... just know that people will have opinions all day long, it's completely up to you how you choose to deal with the negative ones. They will always be there, you can either hide from it or take it for what it is. Be proud of yourself; you've done something that not many people can ever do.

wow, that was some amazing advice! i do tend to want to please others...a lot, so that might be why i was so upset by one measly negative comment. i do love writing for many of the same reasons you write. It helps me figure out all the things i have roaming around in my head, and it feels so good to get it all out on paper. and i just feel closest to myself while writing.

But another reason i like to write and the main reason i wrote my book is because i like entertaining people- my novel is fantasty/fiction genre- and it's like my own personal escape from every day mundanity; the same reason i love to read, and i would love it if my book helped at least one person tohave that same escape. Plus being able to be in control of what happens to your characters is another perk to writing fiction. In the real world i'm very passive aggressive, but in my writing world i ama power monger! haha

Thanks again for your advice Willow! it helped a lot!
Willow said:

I'm a writer, too. My editor told me, "The novel is dead, and you wrote the last one." I have been rejected by many agents and publishing houses - so I know all about receiving negative remarks. Here's how I get through:

I figured out WHY I write. I write because it helps me see things in different ways. I write because I feel the need to, like a splinter in the mind. I write because, once it's on paper (or a screen), I don't have to think about it anymore. Why do you write?

And I figured out why I'm not publishable or liked: publishing houses want to print what sells. They don't care if someone actually wants to read it or not. If it is purchased, that's all they care about. If I don't fall into their money-making mainstream, then I am not someone who will be read.

If you like what you write, then that needs to be all you need. If you write to please others, some will be pleased and others won't. The more you need their approval, the more disappointed you will be as a writer.

Do what's right by you, and let them go.

I just wanna say that I think it is amazing that you have a book published and up for sale just think of the confidence, courage and imagination it took for that to happen. I would never have that much confidence. Remember there are always unhappy people in this world that only want to bring you down to where they are and will find anything they can to bring you there.

I'm not a writer, but I'm an artist of sorts,and Ijust wanted to say that anytime you create something and put it out into the world, you are automatically making yourself vulnerable. If you put something in the public domain, you are unconciously giving people the right to criticise you and for an artist, someone negatively critiquing something you put blood sweat and tears into can be the hardest thing.

The important thing is to be able to recognize the difference between negative comments and negative (but constructive) criticism. There is an entire world of difference between "your book sucks" and "your characters are static" (heh, sorry that was the last piece of criticism I got) Negative comments should be ignored completely, because they are coming from people who have not taken the time to review and analyse what they think of your book. Their opinions don't matter because they don't really know what their opinions are.Negative criticism on the other handis extremely helpful in growing as an artist (or writer in your case).

I'll give you an example to illustrate my point. When we get assignments or testsback at school, many students look at their mark and never look at the thing again. And then they get a similar mark on the next assignment or test. When I get stuff back from professors I almost don't even care what my grade is (okay that's not true, but with the semester over in a couple weeks, I've stopped caring) I want to read the comments my professors made about what I've handed in. And then the next time around, my grade has usually gone up. I'm always trying to outdo myself, and as a writer, penning a novel that was better than your last should always be your goal.

I also wanted to say congrats on the book. I think it is extremely brave of you to take something you really care about and make it available for outside criticism, and to try to get your stuff out there.Not many people are that brave.Good luck with your next book

thank you everyone for their advice and outlooks on the situation! i appreciate it sooo much I'm moving this discussion to the 'word must be heard' group if you want to comment on it. Thanks again!