washing hair deadlock untangle :( any help to keep them locked?

Everytime i wash my dreads they become so soft and untangle. When I dont wash them for a week they become so tight and i wish it stays like that FOREVER. Sometimes i put off washing for 2 weeksbecausei know its gonna go back to its 'normal' state. I have to spend hours trying to lock my hair again and it kindafrustratingan de-motivating Any help on what i should do or what type of soap to use?.
updated by @jale-gorcan: 01/13/15 09:02:10PM

what are u doing spending hours trying to relock it stop thast leave it alone let it dread on its own it will loosen b=4 it tightens but all the hours your spending working on them is undoing progress ..stiop doing anythung but washing


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