I generally ignore peoples opinions... I already believe different things, think differenty, plan on raising my kids differently... but on the appearance side, dreads are one of the more drastic and non-conforming things Ive ever done. Surprisingly, my family has said almost nothing (positive or negative) about the change. Most of my friends haven't said a word... mostly in the beginning it was just things like,"wow! what made you go with dreads?". I don't really care that people don't ask me about them, I didn't go dreaddy for other people. I did it for me... so I can't figure out why this bugs me so:Last weekend I had a friend over and befor he left, he made the comment that the dreads looked like they were coming unravled (normal for newer dreads, nothing substantial) and asked when I was going to comb them out. I gave a half-hearted "I don't know..." and moved on. Probably upset at myself for not defending the look and a bit ashamed of how they look in their current state.I know dreads are a process; I'm in this for the long haul... but its odd not having any other dreadies around me to encourage the process. The only positive feedback I got was from a guy who doesn't even like me (or maybe he does now? its a really odd relationship there), so I couldn't even tell if the complement was genuine or not.How do you guys ignore the negativity? I know my story isn't nearly as bad as some of the persecution experienced out there, but I know this isn't the last time I will have to face this sort of thing.Blessings,flightless
updated by @flightless: 06/10/16 02:04:39PM
Ignoring the naysayers
Oh dude, that was nothing. The last person who commented on my hair immediately asked if they could burn my dreads "once I was tired of them."
How do I cope with the negativity? Well...first off, I try as hard as I can to never bring up my hair in conversation. Nobody ever has anything nice to say about it, and I don't want to hear any of the not-so-nice things. And when I do hear negative things...eh, I've never really cared about what others think of me, so I don't take them seriously.
My own dad said "you look like a dog's butt". Which I know is not true. Some people just grasp at whatever words come into their heads...even if it makes them sound childish. I guess it's human nature. Not everyone is going to understand. But hopefully most people will remember the standard saying: "If you don't have anything nice to say...."
Thank you all.I knew my experience was nothing compared to some of the nasty stories out there. My reaction was probably becaus I tend to live just like Olivia said: "if you can't say anything nice...". I suppose I expect other people to live by the same rule... especially my friends.I'm getting to the point of truly not caring about what people think but its going to be a long road, just like the dreads.Maybe this is more of a self discovery trip than I thought it would be?Thanks again- this is immensly encouraging to hear.
