Hey all, I've been looking all over the site and at pics, reading posts and I am SO happy a friend linked me to this site! This is exactly the place I need to be!I have wanted dreads for years but never actually did it and my husband literally has hated dreads. For a long time, I just let it be. Lately though, since becoming a mother and my life being entirely about other people and me feeling as though I am losing sense of self- I have decided dreads are something I really want to consider. I bought "dread falls" hair extentions to try it out and give my husband a chance to adjust- AMAZINGLY- he kind of likes them and has changed his views a LITTLE. When I found this site last night, he DID get a little wiggy, realizing that I was getting closer to the day I actually start them.... Oh well. I've wanted dreads for so long. It may sound strange but I feel as though they would be the right outward expression of ME. I love the way I look in my dread falls (aside from the fact they are fake and I'm not into fake anything).So far, the T&R method looks like the way I'm interested in. BUT, as I said- that is why I'm so glad I found this site- so many opinions and experiences to gain insight from! So excited.I look forward to meeting you all and hearing your input.Blessed Be!!Lainna
updated by @magdalainna: 02/14/15 09:05:17AM
Hello- new here, dread hopeful!
Welcome! if you went all natural they would evolve slowly and people would get eased into them if thats desired. If your husbands cool go for the T&R that speeds things up a bit.
whatever way u go its going to be a life changing experience and yes enhance your sense of self
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
welcome to the site! I'm excited for you to start your journey. I did mine with tnr and kind of wish i had gone natural for personal reasons. but I still love my little tnr babies. so I'd say thumbs up on that one ;}
Welcome!! I have gleaned so much from having my dread babies! Im only on day 5 but already find this process a very spiritual eye opening one! Good luck!
Welcome! I'm going natural route, into my day 50-something right now.Have you identified what's making your husband feel so against dreads? Do they represent something to him, or make him feel like you are becoming "someone" else? I'm thinking if you can get to the root of this issue he has with them, then perhaps it can be a journey he supports you in, if that's what you want.There's a lot of info here on how to do t&r to achieve the best results, and how to go natural too. I hope you feel at home here, and enjoy your new journey. It really does help bring you closer to yourself, and in turn create a great sense of oneness with the world at the same time (natural route really seems to spawn that feeling the most IMO).
Thank you all for the kind welcome!!In response to my husband's dread hate- he feels they are "dirty" and Im likely to get "bugs". He has said he doesn't find them attractive, even on very beautiful women- BUT in discussions with him today- he said he was willing to be more open about it when I explained to him that I REALLY feel like I would feel more like who I AM.. I'm sure to people HERE that makes sense, to him, I don't think he gets it (even though he's a metal guy and sported long hair for many years).From looking at pics, I really think the thinner dreads would look better on me- so any tips would be greatly appreciated!I already LOVE this site! Mama Christina said:
Welcome! I'm going natural route, into my day 50-something right now.
Have you identified what's making your husband feel so against dreads? Do they represent something to him, or make him feel like you are becoming "someone" else? I'm thinking if you can get to the root of this issue he has with them, then perhaps it can be a journey he supports you in, if that's what you want.
There's a lot of info here on how to do t&r to achieve the best results, and how to go natural too. I hope you feel at home here, and enjoy your new journey. It really does help bring you closer to yourself, and in turn create a great sense of oneness with the world at the same time (natural route really seems to spawn that feeling the most IMO).
Hmmm, yeah, a lot of people think they're dirty, and they encourage bugs/dirt. My husband had the long-ass black hair (as did I have black hair to my waist and baby bangs in front) and was a metal/death metal/black metal dude for years. for some metal guys that had long hair or dreads, you always knew those guys that just totally had gross dirty hair/lifestyles, so I can see how it could be his assumption coming from the genre. Lots of "neglect", and lots of guys with clean long hair too.I'm happy for you he sounds more open each day to them. They take a while to grow on people. My husband tells me that dreads are for people who are strong inside because it is such a definite difference that people notice and have strong opinions on in most cases so some people cannot handle the reactions and carry them off. Whether or not he's right, I don't know 
But I do believe I know what he means.The t&r you can do pretty tiny, but keeping them from congoing together will be your maintenance. I had little t&r around my face and they found friends and became one (they still aren't big by any means, mine are pretty much on the smaller side I'd say).Also, be prepared that when he really sees you with your own dreads, he might just change his mind and be incredibly drawn to you. Mine did that (wasn't against them to begin with tho), and i've heard of others doing that too. if guys can dig the Nature aspect of things, it's like seeing you become empowered and strong to their eyes, even if you already were, it's a physical embodiment of that light within you. A sense of self, and confidence is so alluring. That's just my interpretation though..
But I do believe I know what he means.The t&r you can do pretty tiny, but keeping them from congoing together will be your maintenance. I had little t&r around my face and they found friends and became one (they still aren't big by any means, mine are pretty much on the smaller side I'd say).Also, be prepared that when he really sees you with your own dreads, he might just change his mind and be incredibly drawn to you. Mine did that (wasn't against them to begin with tho), and i've heard of others doing that too. if guys can dig the Nature aspect of things, it's like seeing you become empowered and strong to their eyes, even if you already were, it's a physical embodiment of that light within you. A sense of self, and confidence is so alluring. That's just my interpretation though..
I so love this reply- this is exactly how I feel about it.I am a strong woman and he knows this. Perhaps too strong sometimes. Our daughter has Autism, which we re both certain was caused by vaccine injury and we treat her biomedically (with diet changes and supplements with GREAT success) and I spend a lot of time researching and spreading awareness (not anti-vaccine propaganda, but helping those who have questions or are interested in Biomed.) We have had numerous disagreements in the past because I feel it is our/my responsibility to help wherever we can whereas he feels that focusing solely on our daughter is the proper course. I know in my heart that Autism came into our lives for a reason, I am an outspoken, intelligent and driven person by nature for the same reason. I spend a great deal of my time fighting for children with Autism and helping families realize their rights. I KNOW it is what I was meant to do.(sorry very off topic)The point I strayed from is I already get berated for beliefs I hold, so sporting dreads and getting "looks" for them isn't something that would phase me after the MANY unbelievably harsh, mean and evil things said to me regularly in regards to my stance on Autism and vaccines. Mama Christina said:
Hmmm, yeah, a lot of people think they're dirty, and they encourage bugs/dirt. My husband had the long-ass black hair (as did I have black hair to my waist and baby bangs in front) and was a metal/death metal/black metal dude for years. for some metal guys that had long hair or dreads, you always knew those guys that just totally had gross dirty hair/lifestyles, so I can see how it could be his assumption coming from the genre. Lots of "neglect", and lots of guys with clean long hair too.
I'm happy for you he sounds more open each day to them. They take a while to grow on people. My husband tells me that dreads are for people who are strong inside because it is such a definite difference that people notice and have strong opinions on in most cases so some people cannot handle the reactions and carry them off. Whether or not he's right, I don't know
The t&r you can do pretty tiny, but keeping them from congoing together will be your maintenance. I had little t&r around my face and they found friends and became one (they still aren't big by any means, mine are pretty much on the smaller side I'd say).
Also, be prepared that when he really sees you with your own dreads, he might just change his mind and be incredibly drawn to you. Mine did that (wasn't against them to begin with tho), and i've heard of others doing that too. if guys can dig the Nature aspect of things, it's like seeing you become empowered and strong to their eyes, even if you already were, it's a physical embodiment of that light within you. A sense of self, and confidence is so alluring. That's just my interpretation though..
