updated by @jcisazombie: 02/14/15 06:13:30AM
How do you deal with closed minded parents?
@jcisazombie
14 years ago
40 posts
updated by @jcisazombie: 02/14/15 06:13:30AM
Think positive!! You will get a job If i were you id definitely try and get out of your parents as soon as you can. No one needs to be around that. You're parents are supposed to be there for you in time of need. They are probably just taking their problems out on you unconsciously. Do you have a friend to live with?
@jcisazombie
14 years ago
40 posts
Thanks. =)I moved out once and lived with my friend in Chattanooga for like two months.We put in applications at local stores and none of them called us back so, we deiced to take our search to the mall and put in applications everywhere. The only place that called us back was American Eagle and we got hired there. I worked for two days but, my mom begged me to move back so I quit and started living back with them again. I don't have many friends since I'm a very private person. haha I'm pretty shy. Jessica said:
Think positive!! You will get a job If i were you id definitely try and get out of your parents as soon as you can. No one needs to be around that. You're parents are supposed to be there for you in time of need. They are probably just taking their problems out on you unconsciously. Do you have a friend to live with?
Just don't give up, your going to be out of there in no time! Once you get a job your all set, save up and get your own place. I would tell your parents how your feeling, and just let them know you are trying your best and see what you could do to help them. I know you said you help out a lot but i'd just put it out there to them. Do it at the right time too.. not when they are in the middle of yelling at you. Find a time when they are sitting down watching tv or something. I think it will help a lot. If you have the support from your parents it will only get better. A little <3 to <3 never hurt anyone! It will work!
It sound's like your mom's a little stressed..but it also sounds like she only wants the best for you and she's just trying to make sure that you'll be okay in the future..GED is no big thing, you can still get into almost any college..stay positive and remember your parents LOVE you!
Wow, sounds just like when I lived at home.Here's all your mom really needs to know (this is about what got mine to shush): You're 18. You're living your life as a fledgeling adult and it's hard, but you're doing the best you can with what you've got. Your desicions are YOURS; you will have to pay for them in the long run and they are completely out of her control (I've found that parent's don't deal well with things being out of their hands, but they realize that it has to happen at some point.) but she and your father have instilled in you the tools to make the right desicions (and if not, then you've adapted your own tools... she doesn't have to know that though..).Here's what you need to know: Cut your mom some slack. This has got to be hard on her too, she just has no idea how to express it. She doesn't like that you're growing up and that soon you'll leave. She really just wants the best for you, and though it sounds (and possibly is) like nagging, it's the only way she thinks that she can get through to you. Don't yell, keep your cool. There's nothing quite as strange and confusing as someone that can keep their head in the midst of yelling, and still state their point. Sure, it's hard. But you'll earn their respect in the end. Totally worth the effort.My father and I have a very similar mental disability... We can't stand large crowds of people, I can't seem to tell people what I want (I have a very very hard time ordering things at fast food places, or asking anyone for help.. I can't even order food on the phone), I am so socially awkward it's not even funny anymore... I can be so painfully shy that I literally can't speak to people.. and some days I am a complete shut-in... I can't make myself leave the house. It's hard to explain.. Anyways, dad never got involved in disputes either. Deep down though, he was still just as torn as my mother. It broke their heart when I threw off my 'good little catholic girl' shroud and revealed myself for the nature loving pagan that I am. They made fun of me, cursed my beliefs, told me I was going to hell.... but I kept my head heald high... and to this day my father respects me for that.Stick it out. Keep thinking positive (do a bit of research on the Law of Attraction :3), and stick to your beliefs. Don't let anyone tell you your wrong, and you bend to their will. Hear everything, but take it with a grain of salt and form your own opinion. You have a family here that supports and loves you.
Hey.1st of all, get a job first, hate to say it, but some employers look down on them, so probably best to get that first, you cant be fired for having dreads, you can guage your workplace's reaction and you can also get your mum slightly off your back.Educate your Mum about dreads, mine weren't too keen, but i told them how they could be maintained, that i would get them pro, how they could be cleaned, etc, to dispell old beliefs, also reassure her if necessary you'll get rid of them, this is much easier being male!My advice, may be conformist, but hey, they're your parents, so you gotta try not to piss them off too much. Also I'd reccommend when your mum has a go just agreeing with hber and refusing to argue back, shuts mine up
@jcisazombie
14 years ago
40 posts
Thanks =) and sorry for the late reply Alysha said:
It sound's like your mom's a little stressed..but it also sounds like she only wants the best for you and she's just trying to make sure that you'll be okay in the future..GED is no big thing, you can still get into almost any college..stay positive and remember your parents LOVE you!
@jcisazombie
14 years ago
40 posts
Thanks for the reply and taking so much time to give a very in depth one. =) I'm sorry for the late reply. I'm sure it is stressful on my mom since I'm an only child. I try looking at it from both sides, sometimes it's just really hard. thanks again. Faelwynn said:
Wow, sounds just like when I lived at home.
Here's all your mom really needs to know (this is about what got mine to shush): You're 18. You're living your life as a fledgeling adult and it's hard, but you're doing the best you can with what you've got. Your desicions are YOURS; you will have to pay for them in the long run and they are completely out of her control (I've found that parent's don't deal well with things being out of their hands, but they realize that it has to happen at some point.) but she and your father have instilled in you the tools to make the right desicions (and if not, then you've adapted your own tools... she doesn't have to know that though..).
Here's what you need to know: Cut your mom some slack. This has got to be hard on her too, she just has no idea how to express it. She doesn't like that you're growing up and that soon you'll leave. She really just wants the best for you, and though it sounds (and possibly is) like nagging, it's the only way she thinks that she can get through to you. Don't yell, keep your cool. There's nothing quite as strange and confusing as someone that can keep their head in the midst of yelling, and still state their point. Sure, it's hard. But you'll earn their respect in the end. Totally worth the effort.
My father and I have a very similar mental disability... We can't stand large crowds of people, I can't seem to tell people what I want (I have a very very hard time ordering things at fast food places, or asking anyone for help.. I can't even order food on the phone), I am so socially awkward it's not even funny anymore... I can be so painfully shy that I literally can't speak to people.. and some days I am a complete shut-in... I can't make myself leave the house. It's hard to explain.. Anyways, dad never got involved in disputes either. Deep down though, he was still just as torn as my mother. It broke their heart when I threw off my 'good little catholic girl' shroud and revealed myself for the nature loving pagan that I am. They made fun of me, cursed my beliefs, told me I was going to hell.... but I kept my head heald high... and to this day my father respects me for that.
Stick it out. Keep thinking positive (do a bit of research on the Law of Attraction :3), and stick to your beliefs. Don't let anyone tell you your wrong, and you bend to their will. Hear everything, but take it with a grain of salt and form your own opinion. You have a family here that supports and loves you.
@jcisazombie
14 years ago
40 posts
My rents don't really have a problem with my dreads, it's just the whole idea that "I'm ruining my life." Ya know. I had a job at a pretty stereotypical "uptight" place when I had long hair, and they let me keep my plugs and my septum in, and my best bro had the same piercings and tattoos and they hired him. haha I can always hide my dread under my beanie, which I do before I go in to ask for an application, and I take my piercings out as well. I'm going on a job search next week, I was going to go on one this weekend but, the clutch went out in my car.So, hopefully once I get my job, I'll save money and be able to get my portfolio together and go to College. Stephanie Harrison said:
Hey.
1st of all, get a job first, hate to say it, but some employers look down on them, so probably best to get that first, you cant be fired for having dreads, you can guage your workplace's reaction and you can also get your mum slightly off your back.
Educate your Mum about dreads, mine weren't too keen, but i told them how they could be maintained, that i would get them pro, how they could be cleaned, etc, to dispell old beliefs, also reassure her if necessary you'll get rid of them, this is much easier being male!
My advice, may be conformist, but hey, they're your parents, so you gotta try not to piss them off too much. Also I'd reccommend when your mum has a go just agreeing with hber and refusing to argue back, shuts mine up