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my dread journal

By Kayla Marae Neumann, 2010-09-09
so today was my first day with my dreads. i love them so so much. well ill tell you a little about myself that isnt posted on my profile. i goto this school in a reallly tiny town and i seem to fit ion with noone here but im cool with that. pretty much everyone at this school is a redneck not even kidding it kinda sucks actually they really get on my nerves. so im the only girl at my school well not really just the only girl im the only person with any piercings. i have my septum, spider bites, tounge, nose, navel,eyebrow and my ears are gauged (7/8). i also have two tattoos one is my name on my arm.....yes my name i was 13 so i was pretty ignorant i guess the other is a corsete piece in my back will post pictures soon. well this is all for now if you would like to know anything else im more than happy to share. oh and i love this site its pretty awsome.
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Natural High

By Peaceful Dread, 2010-09-08
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falla långsamt

By Ugglan, 2010-09-08

jag knner hur jag faller , hur mina vingar tappar fjdrar och blir glesa. det tog mig 3 r att bygga upp dem , f dem tta och brande , nu vittrar dem snder nr jag faller ner igen , nu fngar ingenting mig , trots att fallet blir dmpat slr jag hrt i marken nr jag landar , jag gr snder, min sjl vill inte fungera , fr mnga sprickor. krleken r det som kan rdda min sjl och teruppbygga mina vingar , men vart finns krleken i en vrld utan fred , fred skapar ju krlek , men skapar krlek fred ?nr jag r ensam sent om natten kan jag hra hur vrlden faller isr , hur vi skapar lidande , mer lidande n det mnskliga. nirvana r lngt fjrran. frden tar mig mnga liv ,missden och katastrofer , en dag r det min lycka , slutet och resultatet av mina frberedelser. fr jag sjunger p min sista melodi , den r ljudls och skrikig. lyssna s kommer du hra nglarnas tysta skri skra genom vakuumet och studsa mot tomhetens vggar.
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By Ugglan, 2010-09-08

alltid var jag ingenstans borta med vinden mot ingenmansland.frbrukat med nlen som aldrig frr ppna armar men alltid stngd r jag arg och irriterad , desorienterad i mitt lilla rum , knner mig maktls och svag mer natt n dag ,mer hat n makt. mer allt r frlagt och mig bestmma fr mig sjlv gra mina val och mina beslut sjlv , en egen individ utan dina ord utan ditt styre.ser du inte varfr jag r arg du bryr dig men p fel stt ska du fortstta med det kan du lgga av och frsvinna ifrn min dag , ni kan leva ert eget liv jag behver inte va en del fr er r jag bara ett systrar har ett heligt band det kallas frstelse och det behvs ibland , i en vrld s hrd och kall r en syster allt man behver fr att bli lite varm.fred
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comb out

By Jennifer2, 2010-09-07
I combed out my dread locks last night. It did not take as long as i thought it would, but hurt a hell of a lot. I think i will miss them very much so, but they needed to be out. I found so much wax still inside them, i havent used dread wax in at least 4 months maybe longer. I think I will give my scalp some time to recover amd start again in a few months.I think my hair is a lot thinner now also. unless it only seems that way. Plus i think it needs a few hot oil treatments and some tlc.
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Ta din gamla cigg å cykla till bahamas för fan

By Ugglan, 2010-09-05

med fyra sorter r det inte konstigt att jag skriverdet r fabriks hus och mrker utanfr mitt fnster , allt glider frbi , suddigt suddigt och sedan blir allt svart. ibland lyser gatulyktorna men det r inte ofta . dr hemma dricker dem , dansar och r glada , hr ser vi hur livet fr mnga andra susar frbi 200 km i timmen , det r vackert och luktar gott , rken stiger mot himlen som r gr kall och snart svart , folket runt mig har sina egna liv, deras liv , att inte ga sitt liv r ngot jag nskar att inte mnga ska f uppleva , om du lste skulle du g hrifrn och lmna staden dr mina skor har vandrat, du skulle ngrat natten och hatat dagen , du skulle frakta smutskasta allt ,himmel som jord , du vet inte och lser inte , du surfar p betongen som du alltid gjort och lter musiken fra dig till vrlden grset bringar , vi r vackra mitt i betongen vi r allt . men nu r det grnt utanfr mitt fnster och allt som syns och hrs r vinden , jag ser den, grnskan slr mig i ansikten , men snart skall den lmna piskande till det vackra rda , slut.
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bring me to the water and i will drink

By hippie mama, 2010-09-05
i am very pleasantly surprised on how unterrible my kid is doing at two. you hear all these horror stories of other ppl and their expierience and are anticipating this reaction of temper tantrums, and craziness. i mean yes he has changed a little and since i been working hes picked up one or two of his cousins bad behaviors but a simple timeout fades them away when hes around me. instead of the temper tantrums he shares and instead of the hair pulling like most kids his age hes learned colors. im just constantly stunned with the great things he acomplishes and learnes its amazing. i mean not only is he smart and knows things like counting, colors shapes but we are slowly in the process of potty training. although i do admit that since i started working again the leaps and bounds that he was making in the potty area have withered a bit but thats mainly my fault since i havent been keeping up on it but im sure as with everything else when hes reasy hell excell in it. i know im probably just another proud momma but i really do think my son may be advanced for his age. i mean he just catches on so quickly and alot of other 2 and even 3 yr olds arent where he is. this is one of the reasons why we dont plan on having any more children too. i mean its almost like hes been so easy to raise, easy to teach, and has the best personality that id be afraid if i had another kid they may be the total opposite. its like if u hit the jack pot the likliness of u hitting it again on the same machine is slim to none. i know when to fold them. plus i wanna give Gauge everything i can financially, emotionally, and mentally. he deserves that. now dont get me wrong you moms out there that have more then one kid or want more then one im not putting you down. thats awesome that you wanna do that. its just not in my stars ladies.but besides all that noise everything had been going ok. i been working getting paid making tips. johns been working and just recently started his i think 4th semester. hes so smart. im sooooo proud of him. i honestly dont know how he does it all. i mean school full time, work full time and he even has to watch gauge from time to time while im working i mean its gotta be hard on him. poor guy hardly ever sleeps and is always doing homework or is gone. i just feel bad sometimes because i wish there was more that i could actually do for him. hopefully since i got a job he can taqke an extra day off so he can have a little more time for homework and sleep really. i mean hes up all night doing homeowork sleeps for an hour or two then off to school. i just feel helpless sometimes cuz i wanna take some of the weight off his shoulders but im not that smart so i cant help with that and i cant work for him so there goes that idea and me sleeping doesnt give him energy so strike 3 im out , riiight. i just wish he really knew how greatful and proud of him i am. hes got it tough but hes determined to do good by gauge and i and i am thankful and im sure when gauge is our age and realizes the sacrafices made he will be too. johns also inspired me to go back to school. i wanted to go for veterinarian but latley i been thinking along diffrent paths. not sure what though i just dont think i could cut open and animal let alone put one to sleep. my dream is a no kill animal sanctuary but theres not really a degree for that. latley i been thinking of like a kindergarten teacher but you need alot of patience for that. criminal psychology also sounds entertaining. wouldnt that be funny. two psychologists in one house. i just know i dont want my son growing up with no money in the house. i would love to go on vacations to like jamaica and stuff with him. i really want gauge and john both to be proud of me and lets be honest thats not gonna happen at pizza hut! i wanna make a diffrenece. i wanna show gauge that you can do something awesome with your life and i want to show him that you need college to do that and i want to be a good example too. i want him to have two successful parents therefore increasing his likelihood to become something better than us. i can already see how much potential he has now and i dont want to be the example of what not to do ya know. i have the want, i have the drive. my son is my motivator and now all i have to do is figure out what i want to do with my life. thats the hard part though. im tired of being the osterchild of what not to do and im ready to be SOMEBODY, i guesse its just down to who at this point. my first must be that im always striving to be is a great mom though. and thats always gonna be forst. before the job before the career before anything im gonna be gauges mom. thats probably the best and most important job i have, protect, nurture, play, LOVE, teach and just help my son grow. help him become someone greater and better then i could ever be. and damn it hes on his way there. and having a good role model such as my husband showing him that even if your delt a hand of hardship as we are even if u have to work ur ass off to make ends meet you can still become the rose growing out the concrete. and with such a powerful male role model hes already a step ahead of alot of our young men today. and hopefully since hes hit the ground running he can win the marathon of life and come out on top. i have hope. i have this strong feeling that we just may make it and come out on top. what good is the end goal if its just given to you right, . food is waaaaay better when your starving after all.
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Kindness and Compliments

By Alicia Burnit, 2010-09-03
The first set of dreads I had I was never fully comfortable with. I knew that dreads were for me, but I felt alienated every time I went out in public. I always felt as though people were looking and judging me.This second time around though, I am older and feel comfortable with myself and who I am. I have only had my locks for two and a half weeks and have gotten at least three compliments already! It's always nice to feel accepted instead of alienated. My first compliment was from a man from Turkey and the last two were from two African American men. None from any women yet, I wonder if there's a reason behind that. These are all in person compliments I guess, not via internet. Anywho, it's awesome!I love my dreads!
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Music room in the making

By Peaceful Dread, 2010-09-03
Tonight I'm putting all my guitars and stuff in a left over room in the basement. Making it a music room. Will put a computer, an old recording studio and a hifi down there as well. And a couple of amplifiers and a keyboard. The goal is to put myself in my old time music mood.When I was younger I used to live in a studio, one that also was in a basement. I could spend 24/7 there and I always forgot to eat while being there. The best way to loose weight, I guess. Just jamming, composing and recording all day and all night. Other musicians came and went. Bands formed and split, one after another.I starded with playing the base in a reggae band in the beginning of the eighties. But without dreads. Those where the days when I still thought it was impossible for me to dread with my kinda hair. But man, was I dreaming of having it?Internet did not exist and there was no way for me to gain knowledge about dreading. I saw myself as unlucky, being too pale and having too little curls. I wished I was born somewhere else. I adored Marley, Tosh, Toots and the Maytals, Steel Pulse and you name it.I only played reggae those early days. Later on I played more rock and funk. Made my own concoction of the two. Tried to sing even though I did not have the voice for it. But it did not matter, as long as I loved it. Luckily I had someone else singing on performances.I wonder if this music room will put me back into that same vibe and inspiration. It would have been lovely.
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Grandpa has got dreads

By Peaceful Dread, 2010-09-02
I'm writing a lot of stuff here, I've noticed. Dunno if I have any readers, but it does not really matter, cuz I'm doing it mostly for myself.I did not tell you that I was part of bringing up 5 kids. The oldest is 24 and the youngest is 15. Two of them, the oldest ones, are self made. But it does not matter whom was part of making whom, really, I love them all. I have two grandchildren, one is 4 and the other one is 1.That means that grandpa has got dreads. Why does grandpa have dreads now only? I must tell you that I always wanted to have dreads, from young already. But I though it was impossible with my kinda hair. But when I was island hopping in Greece last year, i noticed that my hair locked up in the saltwater, all on its own. The only thing I had to do was to let it be.I did not do anything else but washing those fresh little babydreads of mine in that saltwater, and that did the work. All the work. Then I had to make up my mind. Do I want them or don't I? I always wanted them when I was younger, why not now? Now when I know who I am, now when my identity is no longer wobbling? I was a couple of years past 40 and I was more secure in myself than ever. When would the time ever be better than then? I decided to go for it. So when I came home from Greece and met my second born grandchild I had dreads.And I'm telling you, everybody except my bosses loved them. And I am just totally crazy about them.
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