My first and oldest. ANd yes he is a boy with long hair. But I am sure most of you on this site don't think that is weird as you are here for dreadlocks! xD
xD No worries. My email is a wreck and everything gets lost in mine!
I agree! :D And OMG. Wow that is really not cool I am so sorry you have to deal with that!Just might have to tell him honey great grandma has ascrew loose LOL.And I am glad he speaks up for himself. My little guy is funny he won't let me ever put his hair in a ponytail because he says he is not a girl... I always tell him ponytails are for anyone with long hair who wants their hair out of their face but he has got it in his head that it is just for girls...
Boo. I apparently I quit getting email responses to these comments!
I am so with you about body modding children and the circumcision. I don't even need to add anything.
Also on the gender neutral approach to unknown children. It's not hard. Its not even something I ever really thought about. Just seems natural rather than trying to apply a label with no information.
My son gets the same thing as far as being called a girl. Even worse in my opinion is my grandmother. (again...that woman is going to make me crazy..good thing I love her) She sorely loves little girls. She half raised me and my other cousins. All girls. She wishes my son was a little girl and she tells him this all the time. Tells him how much he looks like a girl and calls him Alexandra(his name is Alexander). I want to shake her some times because no matter how much I tell her not to do it she persists and says she's just joking. IT'S NOT FUNNY!! She always gushes about how much she loves him and how wonderful he is but it still isn't right for her to be making him feel like it's wrong for him to have been born a boy.
Kinda funny, my son has a decent amount of confidence so it's not all bad. When my grandmother calls him Alexandra he comes back with "NO Grandma! I'm Alex!". I love that kid. I hope he keeps it up.
Oh and Heathen Hippie I am glad you could tell he is a boy! I swear everywhere we go EVERYONE thinks he is a girl! I mean I know he is a pretty boy with long hair but he is always in boy clothes! If there ever is a time I am not sure if a child is a boy or a girl I refer to them as your child or baby etc. Poor guy every where we go gets called her, she, etc. :/
I think it is important to start from birth letting your babies know they were born perfect the way they are. Not be cutting this off and poking holes in that etc. It is really sad if you think about that the people as a whole do these things to their children for cosmetic reasons only. There is NO medical beneift to circumcision and it is continuelly performed so they "look like their father or brothers" or so "girls wont think they are gross" etc! And pbviously there is no benefit to ear piercing it either! Parents do it because they think it makes their little girl prettier. She wasn't pretty enough already? You had to cause permanant damage and pain to your new little life so she could be prettier?! I don't get it!
Now I understand if with circumcising if you believe all the lies the medical industry has made up to make you believe there is a real need for it. There are still so many that don't know the truth. Again I knew it in my heart it was wrong with my first (never had the internet to do the research myself). I even held off till he was 3 months old! Then I finally gave in to the pressure around me. I cried all the way into the hospital and then they made me go a floor down while they did it. When I got him back he was lifeless. I will never forgive myself for that. All I can now is do better now that I know all I do and try to get the word out there so other babies can be saved and other mamas can be saved from ever having to feel the horrible guilt that I still do over 6 yrs later...
Heathen Hippie it IS an amber necklace! :D
Oh no Tied up in knots!! See that happens all the time! Luckily it wasn't his whole head! I agree though to me it is serious and your AND your childs wishes should be respected. <3
I love that so many people on here are of a similar mind.
Children are just small people. It is our job to guide not force.
There are decisions I have to make for him for his health and safety and then there's everything else. He is in charge of everything else. How else is he supposed to learn to make decisions for himself and feel confident in his ownership of his body?
There's a little ditty they taught us back in elementary school went something like
Unfortunately my grandmother did not quite get the message and cut his bangs one day. Not the biggest deal in the world but it pissed me off because he hates it and if she hadn't done it then we wouldn't be dealing with his hair in his eyes right now. She understands now though. Oh boy does she ever. I didn't yell but I made sure she understood how seriously I felt about it.
She still makes jokes about it but I know she won't do it again. I told her I wouldn't let her watch him anymore if she did. It seems silly to some people but it's serious business to me.
Thank you! <3 I have trimmed his hair but Isometimes ask him if he wants to cut it because he doesn't like brushing it and ithe always says nope! So I will not cut his either!
Yes others can be a pain but it is not their or their childs head! Just watch out I have heard of mamas coming home to cut hair even when the people watching their child knew it was not wanted. Hopefully you don't have to worrty about that!
And I agree with you 100%! I am an intactivist here although unfortunately I let others pressure me into circumcising my first. Even though I knew it was wrong in my heart I did not have the information or support I do today. Which is why thankfully my second boy is intact. And Ialso believe little girls (or boys!) should not be pierced until they are old enough to understand and actually want them..
I should post a picture of my son. His hair isn't quite as long as your sons but it's getting there. He's currently refusing to let us do anything but wash his hair and he fights that too. Though to be honest we've never combed his hair anyway. But when asked if he wants his hair cut he clutches his head and says "No cuts mama" so there will be no cuts.
I don't want to cut his hair anyway. It's his grandparents.They are not fans of the situation but I hardly care. I get a funny kind of joy out of telling them to leave his hair alone every time I drop him off with them. They all just give me grumpy looks and change the subject now!
I figure barring handicaps or something that make caring for long hair extraordinarily difficult, children should get to choose when parts of them are removed. Just my humble opinion. I don't care if it's "just" hair. It's their hair darnit!
Oh, and your kids are stinkin' adorable as I'm sure you are aware.
xD No worries. My email is a wreck and everything gets lost in mine!
I agree! :D And OMG. Wow that is really not cool I am so sorry you have to deal with that!Just might have to tell him honey great grandma has ascrew loose LOL.And I am glad he speaks up for himself. My little guy is funny he won't let me ever put his hair in a ponytail because he says he is not a girl... I always tell him ponytails are for anyone with long hair who wants their hair out of their face but he has got it in his head that it is just for girls...
Boo. I apparently I quit getting email responses to these comments!
I am so with you about body modding children and the circumcision. I don't even need to add anything.
Also on the gender neutral approach to unknown children. It's not hard. Its not even something I ever really thought about. Just seems natural rather than trying to apply a label with no information.
My son gets the same thing as far as being called a girl. Even worse in my opinion is my grandmother. (again...that woman is going to make me crazy..good thing I love her) She sorely loves little girls. She half raised me and my other cousins. All girls. She wishes my son was a little girl and she tells him this all the time. Tells him how much he looks like a girl and calls him Alexandra(his name is Alexander). I want to shake her some times because no matter how much I tell her not to do it she persists and says she's just joking. IT'S NOT FUNNY!! She always gushes about how much she loves him and how wonderful he is but it still isn't right for her to be making him feel like it's wrong for him to have been born a boy.
Kinda funny, my son has a decent amount of confidence so it's not all bad. When my grandmother calls him Alexandra he comes back with "NO Grandma! I'm Alex!". I love that kid. I hope he keeps it up.
Oh and Heathen Hippie I am glad you could tell he is a boy! I swear everywhere we go EVERYONE thinks he is a girl! I mean I know he is a pretty boy with long hair but he is always in boy clothes! If there ever is a time I am not sure if a child is a boy or a girl I refer to them as your child or baby etc. Poor guy every where we go gets called her, she, etc. :/
<3 Yes!
I think it is important to start from birth letting your babies know they were born perfect the way they are. Not be cutting this off and poking holes in that etc. It is really sad if you think about that the people as a whole do these things to their children for cosmetic reasons only. There is NO medical beneift to circumcision and it is continuelly performed so they "look like their father or brothers" or so "girls wont think they are gross" etc! And pbviously there is no benefit to ear piercing it either! Parents do it because they think it makes their little girl prettier. She wasn't pretty enough already? You had to cause permanant damage and pain to your new little life so she could be prettier?! I don't get it!
Now I understand if with circumcising if you believe all the lies the medical industry has made up to make you believe there is a real need for it. There are still so many that don't know the truth. Again I knew it in my heart it was wrong with my first (never had the internet to do the research myself). I even held off till he was 3 months old! Then I finally gave in to the pressure around me. I cried all the way into the hospital and then they made me go a floor down while they did it. When I got him back he was lifeless. I will never forgive myself for that. All I can now is do better now that I know all I do and try to get the word out there so other babies can be saved and other mamas can be saved from ever having to feel the horrible guilt that I still do over 6 yrs later...
Heathen Hippie it IS an amber necklace! :D
Oh no Tied up in knots!! See that happens all the time! Luckily it wasn't his whole head! I agree though to me it is serious and your AND your childs wishes should be respected. <3
I love that so many people on here are of a similar mind.
Children are just small people. It is our job to guide not force.
There are decisions I have to make for him for his health and safety and then there's everything else. He is in charge of everything else. How else is he supposed to learn to make decisions for himself and feel confident in his ownership of his body?
There's a little ditty they taught us back in elementary school went something like
"My body's nobodies body but mine,
You run your own body
Let me run mine"
Well I believe in that song.
http://www.crps.ab.ca/ers/images/stories/documents/s%20Body%20But%20Mine.pdf
What a cutie! I could tell he is a boy! Is that an amber necklace or something else?
Btw I am loving these comments about leaving kids alone. hahaha. :D
Totally agree with everything you said!
Unfortunately my grandmother did not quite get the message and cut his bangs one day. Not the biggest deal in the world but it pissed me off because he hates it and if she hadn't done it then we wouldn't be dealing with his hair in his eyes right now. She understands now though. Oh boy does she ever. I didn't yell but I made sure she understood how seriously I felt about it.
She still makes jokes about it but I know she won't do it again. I told her I wouldn't let her watch him anymore if she did. It seems silly to some people but it's serious business to me.
And you should post a picture! :D I love little boys with long hair (obviously lol!). ^^
Thank you! <3 I have trimmed his hair but Isometimes ask him if he wants to cut it because he doesn't like brushing it and ithe always says nope! So I will not cut his either!
Yes others can be a pain but it is not their or their childs head! Just watch out I have heard of mamas coming home to cut hair even when the people watching their child knew it was not wanted. Hopefully you don't have to worrty about that!
And I agree with you 100%! I am an intactivist here although unfortunately I let others pressure me into circumcising my first. Even though I knew it was wrong in my heart I did not have the information or support I do today. Which is why thankfully my second boy is intact. And Ialso believe little girls (or boys!) should not be pierced until they are old enough to understand and actually want them..
I for one love it.
I should post a picture of my son. His hair isn't quite as long as your sons but it's getting there. He's currently refusing to let us do anything but wash his hair and he fights that too. Though to be honest we've never combed his hair anyway. But when asked if he wants his hair cut he clutches his head and says "No cuts mama" so there will be no cuts.
I don't want to cut his hair anyway. It's his grandparents.They are not fans of the situation but I hardly care. I get a funny kind of joy out of telling them to leave his hair alone every time I drop him off with them. They all just give me grumpy looks and change the subject now!
I figure barring handicaps or something that make caring for long hair extraordinarily difficult, children should get to choose when parts of them are removed. Just my humble opinion. I don't care if it's "just" hair. It's their hair darnit!
Oh, and your kids are stinkin' adorable as I'm sure you are aware.