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Thinking of combin dreads out
Hey everyone.
I love love love my dreads even if they look like shit right now (messy, frizzy). I know that I will really miss them if I comb them out. But the thing is,my family is making me fell so bad about having them that I just can't take it no more. I listend to them about my hair for 10 months, every day. My brother is the worst. He's really mean to me about my dreads and I don't think he understands how that affects me. like, tooday he said: You're so ugly, look how knotted your hair is, why don't you comb it out... I don't know what to do anymore. I think that maybe this isn't the right time for me to have dreads and i can always have them back. But Iove them so much. Although, maybe I need a change. But I'm so attached to them it hurts. I don't know what to do ...
I've heard the same comments! It's hard to deal with and it can bring tears but chin up!! Nothing is more natural than messy locks. You can do it!!
I would just like to thank you all! Every single one of you helped so much, and I decided after reading your comments and talking to my friends that I won't comb my dreads out. I had a really weak moment, but you helped me stay strong, be myself and not care about what others say. Thank you! Thank you all so much. It means alot.
Right now I would just like to hug you all so tight you would have trouble breathing :D
A lot of the time people use insults to make them feel better about themselves. It's a defense mechanism. He could be jealous that you've taken a such a huge step toward change and he's too afraid to do the same.I believe SE has some letters to family explaining how their not understanding and belittling affects you. You can edit it to your situation.Since it's so hurtful what your brother and the others are sayi it may be time to sit down with them and explain that. Then let them know that if they don't have anything positive to say about your beautiful mess they can (feck right off) keep their mouths shut. Another thing that could help is not reacting. If you don't react, it gets boring and they move on. Just some ideas.
Just think. You'll have rockin dreads soon and you bro will have... What? Same old hairstyle? He's goin around insulting people... And you are growing so much. You are beautiful. I wish you peacefulness and the strength to handle what you need to.
peace and blessings
I would add; your hair probably does look like a real mess at the minute. Fuck knows mine does. You just have to stick with it. Negative comments are something that you will just have to deal with. So deal with it. Don't give up when you've come this far. In just a few more months your hair will look great. Just stick it out and then choose. Don't let others force your hand.
If you are truly ugly, dreads don't make it worse.If you are truly beautiful, dreads can make it better.The resistance from people is always the worst when you start with a change. It doesn't matter if it's for the best or the worst, people are simple primates that hate changes. Start healthy eating, and everyone thinks you're freaking obsessed. Start working out, everyone thinks it's just "a phase" and laughs at you when you don't look like Arnold within a month.If you like them, then you shouldn't get rid of them. Get rid of them only when you no longer like them and you have thought it through for some time.