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ZoeyRainsMom replied to Jane DOe's discussion White sticky stuff inside dreadlocks :S
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DREADLOCKS ATTRACTING FLIES! WHAT SHOULD I DO

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Ashamed to call myself a dreadhead

Everyday I go on this site and read around, I get more and more embarrassed of how I got my dreads, and feel bad about not starting over. I stopped all maintenance but is that enough?
I just can't start over, I love my dreads, and I especially love how they are doing since I stopped touching them.
It's not like I used wax, but sometimes it feels like I kicked a puppy in the face the way some talk about crochet.
I'm sorry... I didn't know.

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Comment by BONES on July 3, 2011 at 6:50pm
do you want to start over because some ppl have made u feel bad like you've cheated or something by crochet or is it because you prefer the look of natural dreads or isit cos sometimes u might not feel like you fit in. You shouldn't feel you should change just to fit in. If you like yr dreads and were happy the way you got them till you read some the negative response's from certain ppl on here then keep doing what ever what ever you like with yr dreads. Don't get me wrong it's good for ppl to tell ppl know certain methods can break hairs and course damage but thats as far as it should go. Nobody has the right to pressurise or bully you into something because they don't agree with the method you choose. There are lots of ppl who don't like neglect, they think its distugusting and looks horrible. Sooooo don't feel bad and if anyone tries to make you feel that way tell them to fuck off. ;) xx

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Comment by Naomi on April 6, 2011 at 11:21pm
the thing about this site is that one way is preached, and you're made to feel like everything else is wrong. most everybody is good, but there are a few overbearing people who continually insist that their way is right, going as far as to slam other people for trying their own way of doing things. I dont imagine they are bad people, just passionate I guess. I've done a few mins of crocheting, and got bored, I've also fixed a few bumps here and there, I can see how it would work really well if you do it without breaking the hair, but i have too many bumps to worry about it. I think- dreads are about freedom of expression. maintian them as you wish, they all have benefits.
Comment by Patricia Fox on January 31, 2011 at 4:49pm
Dude do not feel bad!  It is all good, do as you wish with yourself.  All you can do is be you!
Comment by Crystal O. on January 22, 2011 at 4:17pm

I sure hope you do not feel ashamed at all anymore! Your dreads are your dreads, noone else's. You have what you need to keep them healthy, you love them. So keep loving them and please don't actually kick a puppy in the face, because then you may have a reason to feel ashamed. :)

Comment by Jammin' Jay on January 16, 2011 at 4:21pm
what matters is that you have the information now to know what methods make for healthy dreads. don't be ashamed.
Comment by Earth Child on October 5, 2010 at 4:00pm
awwww its ok. i used a crochet hook on mine too. dont feel bad. i know soaring eagle probably jumped on your ass about it. we all arnt as perfect as him lol. (hes a good friend of mine) but ya dont start over. your dreads are yourse and you can do w them what you like. not all of us have the pacents to let our hiar dread on its own. i had to help mine out. my hair wouldnt get a single knot in it to save my life, and yes a crochet ook is damaging for your hair, but look you have dreads that you love and youv leanred that you dont need to use that lil thing, even though it does make your dreads nice and tight. so hold your head high lil lady cuz your a knotty girl now and being nappy is the shizz. :)
Comment by Emily on August 12, 2010 at 1:43am
hey dont worry about it, i started with a perm and now i dont do anything and they recovered really well. All we can do is move on and use our stories to help other people avoid our mistakes.
Comment by JahWillProvide on August 3, 2010 at 10:18pm
this reminds me of a wonderful quote

"We seem to gain wisdom more readily
through our failures than through our successes.
We always think of failure as the antithesis of success, but it isn't.
Success often lies just the other side of failure." -Leo F. Buscaglia


as long as you love your dreads then it matters not what others say think or feel
your growing your locks for your reasons not yours!

love em care for em an watch em grooooow:]
Comment by jim on July 16, 2010 at 10:05pm
guilt and shame is no way constructive.
there are no laws for how to get your hair dreaded, just different preferences and alternatives.
i guess your bad feelings is based due to group conformity.

i agree on the way issue, simply because it is true.
the rest about demonising crochet? come on! ive used a crochet too, and mine has'nt fallen off!
Comment by turkey on July 13, 2010 at 7:25pm
well u didnt perm it so i wudnt feel bad if i was u

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