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Panterra Caraway

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Location: La Verne, CA
Zipcode: 91750
Country: US

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Dready Revelations from Utah

2010-07-19
By: Panterra Caraway
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So, here I am...my last night in Utah. This trip has been an enlightening one. I have found my own way. I came expecting to feel even more alienated than any other trip, but everything seems to have changed somehow. It started in the airport before I even left. The man who checks the luggage led me through the detector...ofcourse, I was wearing a tam, and given that it was over 100 degrees he said, "We can have a female pat your head covering down if you don't wish to remove it." It was said with alot of respect, so I removed it and this crazy mess emerged (as you can all imagine)...and that was it. Then, in Utah we were greeted with record temps. (some areas 111 deg.!). So, once again, the tam stood out a bit. People were kind out whispering alittle and my daughter explained that I was growing dreadlocks...done! The only lengthy discusssion that I had about the subject was with my daughter's therapist, who I know very well. After I explained my thinking and my reasons (which are spiritual) she said, " I really respect your decisions. I have no knowledge of dreadlocks. I have seen them and wondered what they were about. Wow! Now I think I have a better understanding and that is wonderful!" It made me proud to pass something so life changing on to another person. I want to also say that I have spent alot of time walking back and forth to my daughter's school and I have had a chance to reflect on life and it may sound strange...but I am different. I made this trip only 4 mos. ago and I know that I am not the same person I was. On my walks I have seen lots of horses (which I am usually very afraid of!), but this time I called to them and they came! It was as if we had some kind of shared experience. I felt like they recognized this small, organic growing part of me that is willd and untamed and they felt a connection. They look for me now, and I caress their noses and talk softly to them everyday...it is as if we have an understanding. Isn't life amazing?
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