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Ughh, everyone is saying that my dreads aren't "Right"
So Im moving into week 4-5 and the only maintenance I do is wash with the dread shampoo recommended by everyone on this site ( btw is freaking awesome)
Anyway, my mom tells me last night that my dreads aren't "Right" cuz they don't look like Bob Marley's. Wow Mom, No shit, I'm not a Rastafarian
Then the X-boyfriend says "I told yah" (siding with her) cuz he had dreads. But he's not Caucasian, so my hair texture is completely different. And he waxed and rolled his. However, he ended up shaved his head.
So yeah.... my dreads are messy and there is loose hair everywhere. But I keeping telling them. Its going to take some time for them to mature and I'm not cutting them out. I don't give a flying crap if I do look like a homeless person. It's my freaking hair.
Back to the point.... My Question is....... there is no "Right" way to grow dreads correct?
Can someone please reply and tell me I'm not crazy in my thinking!!
There's no "right" way for them to look...That's why they call it a "dreadlock journey". They grow and change, and every one is different. Everyone's dreadlocks develop at a different pace and different way. They have a life of their own. Give it time, they'll look amazing before long! Keep your head up!
They look naturally awesome to me! Have to say having quite thin hair I've been guilty of suffering from 'dread envy' on the odd occasion. There's a large number of dreadies in my area of the city & can be easy to get despondent through your own thoughts or the comments of others when making comparisons.
However, in exactly the same vein as you mentioned in your post, another person's dreads - as awesome as they are - are unlikely to suit you.
A 'grass is always greener' mentality will always persist as a niggle in the human mentality. Folk with thinner dreads want fatties, people with fatties may regret not separating one or two down into thinner.
The way I see it, having dreadlocks fits perfectly into my life. The ease of maintenance, lack of effort and conscious water-usage makes growing dreads easy as my thinking is centred more around knowing I am living true to myself and not on how my hair looks today, tomorrow or in 5 years time.
You sound like you're already enjoying the ride, so don't fret & look forward to some epic scenery in the months & years to come
You don't have to prove anything to anyone, but if you really want to shut them up you could show them some photo timelines of people with hair similar to yours..
When I started my dread journey....I was at a festival with my friend Wes. Out of the blue he looked over at me and said "I don't think your dreads are right....I have seen lots of dreads and they don't look like that." i laughed and said "just wait". He doesn't remember saying this. But I do. Now he compliments my dreads every time he sees me. I have even overheard him bragging about them to other people many times.
So don't pay attention to what they are saying. You know your dreads are gonna turn out beautiful!!
HUGGIEZ!
You Guys are so AWESOME!!!! Thank You for putting my mind to easy. Sometime I freak out a little when I have to much negativity thrown at me!!
THANK YOU To...
The Barrellady, ToTheAnkles, Doogie, April Brown, and Randi
If this were in person I would totally give you a super big HUG!!!
YOU ARE NOT CRAZY, YOU ARE NOT CRAZY, YOU ARE NOT CRAZY.........How was that Man-d
You shouldn't inform people of things they won't be able to comprehend.And what the hell is an ex doing there giving his opinion? The advantage of the ex part is no longer having to listen to their bullshit.I can tell you there is a wrong way. It involves one or all of these elements:WaxRollingShavingIt's like someone that had an abortion telling you how to raise your kid. "Yea I'm an expert on this matter, I had one of those for like a month before getting rid of it".
First of all everybody hair dreads different and not everyone will have dreads like Bob! Marley's dreads took many yrs to look the way they did and his hair texture was perfect for dreads. Also ya need to take methods into account! Though Marley was ethnic and had the hair type his were natural. Take backcomb dreads or twist and rip and compare all 3. You will see the difference.2nd wax is BAD so that's more than likely why you ex shaved his. I done the same thing like 4 times and now I'm 16mths in all natual. Dreads will be loose! They need to be in order to knot! Dreads don't form over night, its a process of sometimes several mths to yrs depending on hair type, washing, etc..... hang in there and don't listen to ppl. Dreads/hair is gonna be messy for a long time! Patients is a virtue when it come to dreads no matter the method used!
I'm in week 8 and mine are insane right now, tons of loose hair, loos roots and some sticking up like crazy. I'm getting loops and bumps and kinks oh my lol. From what I gather it's doing exactly what it's supposed to. Anyone who is uninformed thinks they don't look right because they don't understand the process. They think dreads and automatically expect Bob Marley or Whoopie Goldberg.. They have no idea what it is to go through the transformation that it takes especially for fine Caucasian hair. My husband was that way until I explained it all and backed myself up with pictures of timelines. That helped him to understand. have patience, I'm with ya!