so im on this soul serach inspired by love an the verry emotion that brought me from my slum was tempting me back to into its grip.some background an subversive advertisment on my thoughtsMid 08 i was looking up into The BiG sky of WY at Rainbow of living an light thinking of peace prosparity an the ease of life without the ridged blades of babalon. a week or so after my return to the nestalgic cage of civ i was being evicted from my home of 1 year an my prof that i could make it on my own, 17 an trying to hold onto my optimisam i moved back to my mothers who i had been away from for sevral years, joining my mother an brothers cause of preparing for the end of civalitaion as we.... an opening thought envelopes sealed but acknoledge for a long time, im verry apathetic but this was allot to handle an over time i became tunnled visioned into thinking tht every tommarow was going to be D day an then became impatient an lazzy, started to play world of warcraft again an lost my determination for nything but killing time, at the end of june i turned 18 an i met jessica, she inspired me to be a better person an reminded me that life gose on with or without me. taken by her every word i became entranced quikly an i found more motivation everywhere, i studdied an started gathering documents for my jobcorps application an got temp work a few times. I started to look for who i was an a way to center my persinality an become balenced, things fell apart the further i advanced with that plan n i faceplanted under the pressure of life, but getting back up i chanced a look to the sky to find my answer was not mold my persinality to one mathmatic salution but to just act the way i do, screw self imposed reform, indulge self expression an disregaurd our stupid rules, still not tottaly with it i resolved to go insane an tho it wasent verry visable i had fun tell i forgot my plan, stumbled an looked up to see a bit clearer picture, followed by a sevral hands reaching out to me an giving the push that will get me back to my blissfull adventures of mind an feet, my goals of advancment in self an my unstable stability. well short as it turned out for anything i write that is the end, forgive my odd styling of languege n misshaps in spelling