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Dready Kids with Unsupportive Parents

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Dready Kids with Unsupportive Parents

This is the forum where dreadies can bring their unsupportive parents to read why it is NOT OKAY to force your kids to be this way or that way. You are a blessed individual born on this world in this time for a reason. We have love. They should too.

Members: 34
Latest Activity: Feb 24, 2012

Dreadlocks Discussion Forum

THEY CRACKED! :)

Started by Brandy :]. Last reply by ashr Sep 26, 2011. 2 Replies

Hello everyone! this is such a great group and i saw there were no discussions started so thought id be the first :] Mine is more of a success story, but my parents were just like all of yours,…Continue

Tags: dreads, parents

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Comment by kdjordan on April 27, 2011 at 10:31am
Dani- thanks for the support! This past weekend was the best time I can remember with my parents. My mom and her partner were very supportive and equally happy for me. I was even told, "I love your life" by Jean. It was the greatest feeling in the world:)  Thanks for all the support and stories on here that provide me the strength and determination to show my mom who I really am.
Comment by Dani Hopkins on April 24, 2011 at 7:05am
hey kdjordan - that's awesome, I'm really glad you can prove her wrong and show her everything you've accomplished. My relationship with my mother improved hugely after I left home, she practically begs for me back now lol.
Comment by kdjordan on April 21, 2011 at 4:30pm

So I am almost 22, and my mother and I have never had the best relationship.  I will say upon moving out and controlling my own life, our relationship has improved immensely. That being said, Easter is this weekend and my mother, her wife, and my two adopted siblings are coming to see me for the first time. They have never been to see 'my place' or even glimpsed into my life prior to this. I have started the neglect method, and now my hair is long, in my eyes (which my mom can't stand) frizzy and starting to section and knot up a little. I will admit at first I was little nervous as to her reaction and had considered covering them with a hat all weekend, however- it's time to be real.  For once I get to show her MY LIFE.  Not to sound too vengeful, but I am pretty pumped to show her how much I've accomplished with my life, the awesome house, job and life I have built with my girl.  All the things she either doubted for me, or placed doubt in me with negative comments and mind games. I get to show off, just a lil bit.  :P

Every holiday, EVERY single one, goes array and my mom gets 'so stressed' and flips out, but that is at her house. At mine, we are going to be peaceful and kind to one and other, and any negativity is going to be giving a stern warning (only one) and a swift kick out the door if continued.  I am excited to see my family, to show my mom what I've become and done with my life- dreads are part of my life and I am not going to hide them from her. I'll say my bit, she'll have plenty to say I'm sure, but honestly whether she is "ok" with them or not, I'm looking forward to being the most honest and true to myself I've ever shown my mom. 

So I know this group is for people with unsupportive parents- I don't know if mine will be or not. I'm not concerned though, whether she accepts them/me or not, I'm living and loving my life and can not wait to have a full head of dreads!

Comment by Dani Hopkins on April 21, 2011 at 5:54am

Heya guys, thought I'd share my story a bit :)

I'm 22 now, so I'm not really a kid and moved out of my family home at 17/18. My family have always pestered me about my dreads - they were always spouting the usual stereotypical crap about ho dreads are dirty, etc - even though they saw me wash them and religiously keep them clean.

It was mostly because I was the first born and the first grandchild and I had bright blonde, straight hair that all my female relatives would fuss over and spend hours brushing - so they felt slightly offended that I'd 'mess up' my 'perfect' hair. They didn't see that I was fed up with my hair and that I was fed up of the fuss that came with it. I was quite rebellious but my parents weren't particularly strict with me. I began to dread my hair and got nothing but negative comments and jokes about them cutting them off when I wasn't looking for the 2 1/2 years that I had them, I'd had enough so I cut them and as it co-incided with mother's day, I told my mother it was a present for her and she was really pleased. I stuck with my straight hair for a few months but as soon as it was long enough to dread, I had to - I missed them so much and I missed being me. I felt like I'd sold out for other people.

I'm now six months into my second set and have learned that I will nevr give in to pressure from family, or anyone else - I will only ever cut them off if I decide I don't like them - and that's not really going to happen.

Since all this, my parents and my siblings have accepted that my dreads are a part of who I am, I'm happier and more confident with tme and they're generally doing me good. They've even started to compliment them - and my nan loves them ("Wow - it's wild!") On the plus side - if my mam starts to moan again, I'll remind her that I cut them off for her once already, and it won't be happening again :)

 

Good luck on your dready journey and don't ever give in to pressure - just be you <3

Comment by Kelsey Joy on November 22, 2010 at 4:29pm
im eighteen, i dont live with my parents anymore, i moved in with my boyfriend last winter. my mom doesnt like my dreads and keeps asking me to take them out, but her fiance loves them and says they fit my personality perfectly haha she keeps getting mad at him for telling me he likes them, cuz she wants them out! my dad is a whole other story, he loves long hair ive always had long wavy/curly hair. one time in 5th grade i got my hair cut a little it below my shoulders and he freaked out and wouldnt talk to me... so i havnt talked to him o seen him in 2 months cuz im terrfied of what he will say. i actually saw him a couple days after i started my dreads put i put a hat on an had my hair in baraids so he didnt notice, but im probably going ot see him on thanksgiving but now my dreads are coming along aot better so his reaction might not be so bad...hopefully

but i love my baby dreads, and i cant wait or them to grow really long and mature!!
Comment by ashley ✿ on July 15, 2010 at 10:35pm
haha, you just need to go to a book store or something where everything is laid back, not barnes and noble though...they're kinda uptight...but im getting a job this fall, and I plan on applying at like, woolies, or other little shops that you'd fit into...now my mom isnt telling me these are coming out, but she does call me a tree hugging lesbian, which doesn't bother me because they're always messing with me for one reason or another...nd what's surprising, my grandmother, the one who loooved my hair, has not said one negative thing about it, like when i dyed my hair...haha, i love the world.
Comment by Shayna Jackson on June 29, 2010 at 6:35pm
ha ha rents crack me up! like they think we are rebeling against them bc we find ourselves through dreads n things they dont understand! now that i cant find a job bc of my hair they think they KNOW they are right and keep bugging me n pressuring me to cut them to find a "good job"
Comment by ashley ✿ on June 21, 2010 at 7:20pm
This group is good for beginners that still live with their parents. I am eighteen, and I still live with my mom, right? Well, she is having a very, very large problem with my dreads, saying stuff like "When you move out, you can look like a freak all you want," "Im not walking around with a freak," and my favorite, "You look like a dyke," Not that I have anything wrong with people who choose that lifestyle, I just don't like those comments, so knowing other people are having problems with it, it really helps me out. She keeps telling me that I'm brushing them out (i got them two days ago) But I'm not going to.
Comment by Nikki on December 23, 2009 at 6:45pm
i love what you sad jammiee benson! yes i think my dad said that to in the begining..lol u still call your dad daddy? wied ide feel funny diong that..for some wierd reason...undisclosed..*shiver*
Comment by Nikki on December 23, 2009 at 6:39pm
hahaits een that way for my mom too! is been almost 4rs now...it gets realy frustrating,i just TRY to ingore, it gets on my nerves tho cuz everyone in my family thinks this is not the normal way for hair to be. now THAT really boils my blood.my dad is better about it,so oviusly i like him better...lol
 
 
 

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