At a crossroads with my almost 20-month-old dreadlocks
Dreadlocks Journey Emotional Support
I'm looking for some encouragement here. I've come to a crossroads & I am *this close* to chopping my dreads off.
I have a few qualms with the way my dreadlocks have progressed. At almost 20 months in, I still have hair around my neck & ears that just sits there, silky & smooth & stubborn. In addition to that, *most* of the hairs on the lower part of the back of my head have only just recently begun to lock up, & therefore are several inches longer than the dreads on the top of my head. In short (no pun intended), I have a dread mullet. My very dear & very gracious husband has delicately informed me that I look pretty crazy when I wear my hair down, & so I pretty much never wear it down. I don't care much about looking good for anyone, but I do like to know that my husband admires me...so, I wear my dreads in a bun. Every day. Everywhere I go. I also have a one-year-old who LOVES to yank the longer hairs & it's enough to bring tears to my eyes! If those things weren't enough, my husband has also (again, very delicately & even reluctantly!) told me that it's hard to get close to my head (while cuddling in bed, for example) because my dreads feel so scratchy. Sad. Naturally, I'm losing momentum & feeling down about things.
So, I have questions & I hope you all have good answers.
1. I know dreadlocks tend to lock unevenly, but is it common for the unevenness to be so DRASTIC? Is it likely that they'll stay this uneven for much longer?
2. Could it be that they're so uneven due to the fact that I am constantly putting them up? Would it help if I literally did nothing to them except wash as usual and separate when needed?
3. Can anyone venture a guess on when I can expect my dreads to soften up? Or are there any maintenance ideas for softening them? I thought that they'd always be soft since I only t & r'ed loosely in the beginning, & have allowed them to freeform ever since...but they definitely feel scratchy. My oldest son has asked me to cut them off *because* of how scratchy they are! Oh, the honesty of a child!
4. This isn't really a question, but I welcome anything you may have to add. I need a pick-me-up before I go nuts & get myself a pixie cut.
updated by @MamaEmmelia: 02/15/15 03:15:56AM