so i got an email today about manicured locs
Dread Maintenance
In theory I agree with you. LOLHowever, I think a lot of us (natural, maintained, etc.) take for granted the anonymity that is allowed via the internet. My rule of thumb is if I wouldn't say it to you like this in your face...Im not going to type it. If someone approached me and was asking dred advice - I would give them my experience. Tell them they have to pick their own way - fail or succeed. Learn from the mistakes. But realize all my mistakes may not be theirs to make. I have friends who tried interlocking and instantly had damage. I on the other hand - have never had damage or lost a loc. But I ont know their hair - and they ont know mine. So I try to be fair all the way around...and honest. In the corporate world in various states - dreds are a no no. Natural dreds are a hell no. Shaved heads on women or a GTFOH and NO! (LOL) I mean we all know some folks are judgmental. You guys prefer and love natural dreds. And everyone you talk to you - you are going to have nothing but positive things to say about going natural. Got that. But if my experiences in natural, palm and interlocking are just as good - I can speak positively of those. Its not saying do it, do it, do it. Its just saying I have had positive experiences. 10,000 Frenchman may not be wrong, but we must not forget there are 1,000,000 frenchmen.
NaturalWomyn said: I wasn't looking for an apology, simply stating that when we all try to censor our own personalities here it becomes a very boring place.
I think you came up with some valid points.
I didn't necessarily mean YOU had issues, I meant all the people in general who are constantly whining that people with natural dreads need to be nicer. I wasn't being mean I was just giving my opinion to a growing trend that I''ve noticed. Honestly I think we should all just say what we feel and if someone doesn't like it well it's just the internet! ;o) Much Respect
Jaquerian McCain said: I was not being condescending at all. And if that is the way you see it - for that I apologize - for it was not my intent. I've done free form - understand the beauty of it. I have also done palm rolling and now interlocking. I have enjoyed each step, each method. What I stated was simple facts. Does not mean I agree with it...but it does not change it being factual. Everyone is not accepting of the "natural" look. Heck a lot of companies don't allow dreds at all - maintained or not. And they are within their legal right not to accept it if they have "appearance guidelines" that are clearly defined. So I am not being condescending when I say that most up on this site would not get pass the reception desk. Its factual. In fact when I was clerking here I did not have locs. I had cut my locs off and grew my hair out - kept it straight. I knew what was going to be required of me. When up north I did differently. Here in the south YOU as a white woman can walk in maybe get away with certain things I cannot as a black woman. Its fact. Not me being condescending. And here in the south a white women with straight hair and do things YOU can not do. Fact. So no hidden issues here. Im not calling you out saying you have issues or anything. Have no idea what you may or may not have. However, nothing that I stated in my previous post was snide or condescending. And once again if that is how you saw it - for that I apologize, but I stand by what I said. YOU may not have called anyone stupid...but I have seen it on this site quite a few times.
NaturalWomyn said: maybe you should take your own advice a lil? If you want things to be different try leading by example because your post was pretty condescending. Not that I care, I personally think we should all be free to express our opinions as we wish and if it's not always sugar coated oh well (wo)man up. I see more and more people who didn't dread naturally saying that "we should all just be nicer" and honestly I just don't see the problem. Just because we don't agree with someones method doesn't mean we're saying your stupid. Sounds like unresolved issues to me...
Jaquerian McCain said: Well I would not say you should stop. however, I would say that presentation is key. I understand that most on this site are "natural" locs. However, I for one - no matter how much I would like to free-form my locs simply cannot. I work at a law firm, I go to court, my appearance is critical. Knowing this...me wanting to do something has nothing to do with my paycheck. And my paycheck maintains my house. Now if I worked in advertising or some other field that was more diverse and accepting...perhaps. But as a black woman who works in a majority white man's profession...there is a need to acclimate to certain things in order for me to get to the point I want to be. A cookie cutter image can have raw edges.
On here - a lot of what I read is how stupid folks are to go and have locs maintained. How ignorant they must be because they obviously do not know that they can do this or that themselves and that every loctician is attempting to rip someone off, and that everyone who interlocks or crochet has damaged locs. Which none of that is 100% true. I simply think that a more polished way of communicating would be better. I know YOU don't like interlocking. However, I also know that if you walked up in my law firm looking for a job you would not get past the reception area. Not even as kitchen help. You may be the smartest person in the world - but no one here would listen. So how one looks is important.
I think free-form locs are the best. I have had them. Most of my family are true Rastas in the hills of Jamaica. They live a true rastafarian lifestyle. Yet even they know when they come to the states to visit - they have to maintain a certain appearance in order to not be looked at as homeless or big black men who are out to rob and steal. Its the american culture. Things are changing, but they are not there yet. So for those have professional jobs that they need to looked maintained - I think all of us should be more polished in our comments. Not degrade them, call them stupid or ignorant.
