Dazed and Confused Blues
You all are so amazing and SUCH beautiful spirits!
All of these responses brought me joy and happiness of course I still feel a little unsettled, with the thought of him with other girls and potentially running into him.. and having to change my mind from a fixed idea to an ever changing one.. which is life.. I'm surprised we don't have it hard wired already that change is ok! .. well some people have a better handle on it than others.. I just wish these things weren't so hard and that there was a definite way to come to a conclusion and move on with it either together or separate.. I feel like you should know someone well enough after 2 and a half years to know if it's worth working on and saving and especially when living together.. I told him I would give it a chance.. he's the hesitant one.. and what if after I leave he realizes he misses me and wants me back and at that point I've met someone else? even if that someone else was just a flame.. I don't want to feel like i never gave it my all because I feel like I did.. and that's my thirst for his all. I know he tried his very best.. and now he's pooped but being hyped up to get back out into the world by his friends when they know how good our relationship was I'd like to hope for the best for both of us truly.. no matter what happens.. you all are right; we don't know what the future holds; the key I'm concluding is in the moment, happy and content with what I'm doing right now.. Not thinking about the "what ifs" It's just hard because like you said Soaring Eagle, there's so many scumbags out there.. I don't want to end up being blind sighted again.. and the new hobby I picked up is surfing! It's been an amazing outlet and connection to Earth and the water element to remind me to go with the flow and not resist those waves that are coming no matter what.. The trick and hardest part is hanging on , or getting dragged under until I can make my way to the surface.. So I'm practicing until staying a float is effortless. <3