1 year and still no dreads

Hi everyone. I've read and dreaded and read and dreaded and read some more. I figured I'd just start a new post and let you guys tell me what to do.

As for patience...I've got it. It's been almost a year. I know not to use any products and I've been using the backcomb route since I began. I have used rubber bands off and on because I find that I can't keep my hair separated enough to figure out which locks need work and which ones are ok. But I'm in the process of taking them out right now.

So. I've only got a couple of strands that are really starting to feel tight, but since it's been a year, the roots are grown out and not locking. The ends of my hair (about 4 inches) have never locked and most of the sections aren't dreading anyway. I started with hair a little above shoulder length and now it's down past my shoulders and looking a mess. I've debated cutting it some just to see if I can work better with it.

I backcomb and backcomb and hours later my hair is straight as a board again. Please don't tell me some people just can't do locks. I've been working on this a year. I'm committed and will take any solid advice I can get.

I'm feeling overly disappointed today, which is why I'm finally posting. I'm not ready to give up, but I'm ready to cry (lol). It's just not working and I'm pretty much at a loss as to what to do.

Cheer me up guys. Give me hope. I've wanted dreads for a long time. I finally took the plunge, despite crazy advice against it from some of my closest friends. I don't tend to listen to most people, but you guys seem to know what you're talking about. I want crazy, big, natural, awesome dreads. What the heck do I need to do??

If I didn't provide enough info, just let me know. I want to get this done and do it right.

updated by @jeannie-pitt: 02/14/15 06:31:59AM

stop backcombing your undoing proggress dreads dont need work they need to be lefyalone do njothing for 3 months and u will have dreads its that easy stop messuing with them

--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

what are u washing with how are u washing how often is your haior oily

lets start there

then no rubber bands ever

use beads

backcombing falls ap[aert its what backcombing does

but u never want to recdo it

so

u got a choice wash and do nothing and let it dread it will dread but can be slow and i dunno your hair mufght dread slow it might dread fast too if u leave it alonbe

other choice twist and rip it holds together way better then backcomnbb

then after u do it once..do nothing

u never want to keep doing it doing it doing it working on dreads constantly will destroy dreads u gotta have a hands off policy do nothing..leave em alone to dread

--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

Oh thank you so much for the video! It almost DID make me cry. Amazing amazing dreads.

Ok so I've taken some pictures. When you see them you may tell me I've been more fatalistic than necessary lol. The first pictures are from right now...which is right after backcombing AGAIN in between my initial post and reading what you said about not to. :/ But keep in mind it's been a year and I pretty much expected to have dreads like those in the video by now.

The other pictures are from a few months ago, with rubber bands. They look better in pics from a distance, but you'll probably be able to see that they aren't locking like it seems like they should be.

As for backcombing, I've left it alone for about a month at a time on a couple of occasions. All that seems to get me is nowhere. No change. The strands that are completely free stay that way. Lately I've been washing it like 2 to 3 times per week with either tea tree soap or organic carrot paraben free body wash. Prior to that I would just wet it in the shower and I've been over a week without washing. No results.

The reason I finally wrote is because I've become desperate enough to try anything. I've tried everything I could think of already. I've debated trying product, despite those against it. I've debated throwing organic honey in it, and this morning I even thought about going outside and grabbing some rotten motor oil from my V dub. Anything...Seriously...desperate haha.

I've had dry scalp problems for years, but my hair ends up greasy and oily if I don't wash it for a week and a half or so.

The twist and rip thing doesn't seem to work for me. Quite possibly I'm doing it wrong. At this point, a few strands have matted in the middle and are loose on either end, making it difficult to backcomb...which I'm apparently not supposed to be doing anyway.

Here are the pics. Thank you SO much for connecting with me.

Directly after backcombing again today.

A not so good one.

A pretty good one.

An attempt at look perty for the camera a few months ago.

Ok let me have it! Oh the other thing I do sometimes is sleep with a hat on. That seems to help, but not always. Hat? No hat?

And how do you do the bead thing?

And I've seen some wrapped with colored thread. Helpful? Not?

Questions...questions... Thanks again.

updated by @jeannie-pitt: 02/05/15 10:12:49AM

you would most defiantly have dreads by now if you weren't re-backcombing your hair all the time. That just ruins any progress you may have had. The rubber bands have also hindered any possible knotting of your roots. Leave your hair alone and you will be amazed at how quickly they dread. Please stop using any starter methods on your hair! No more backcombing or twist and rip. You are stopping your dreads from forming. The most times any of those methods should be used is once.

Ok cool. I get the no backcombing thing now lol. There's not much curl to my hair, it's really rather straight. When you say leave it alone, does that include washing? Does that include leave the hats in the closet? Before I decided to dread I never, ever combed my hair, and washed it once a week or less for a good two years. It never dreaded. I'm not convinced that I qualify for the 'leave it alone and it will dread' philosophy. I wish I did!! Any more info will be welcomed. I thank you guys for being so quick to reply.

NaturalWomyn said:

you would most defiantly have dreads by now if you weren't re-backcombing your hair all the time. That just ruins any progress you may have had. The rubber bands have also hindered any possible knotting of your roots. Leave your hair alone and you will be amazed at how quickly they dread. Please stop using any starter methods on your hair! No more backcombing or twist and rip. You are stopping your dreads from forming. The most times any of those methods should be used is once.

what texture is your hair? it looks like it would dread to me.

It was always very, very fine until I had my son. Now it's a little bit coarser with a tiny bit of wave.

Hey ive had my dreads for a year and 2 months now i think i backcombed once and check them out now! Stop messing with them.What do u have more than anything else in the world?Time. And all they need is time and it seem to me u got lots more left!

I'm sensing a common theme here. Done. No more messing with them.

Ok though. Recommendations on a hat or bandana or something? Or should I avoid that...