hi everyone im 23 and im married to a man with dreads as well. we have a son gauge and he is 16 months in a few days and we started his dreads about 2months ago or so. all is good we get the awe how cute the whole family matches comments and we get the questions on how its done and all those good things that i honestly dont mind. now lately since gauges hair has been looking more unkempt then it has in the past i been noticing the rude comments. like we were at the park and i over heard this lady complaining to another parent and all i could make out was " oh my thatg poor child like he doesnt know any better....blah blah blah" then the next week i go to another park and a lil girl goes look at his clown hair and a boy said thats stupid" now mind you we had a bunch of better comments sying its cute and the kids love it but it jsut sucks that as a human being the bad comments linger with you ya know. and then last week this one really got to me. we were walkin through the mall and i let gauge walk instead of forcing him to sit in a stroller and he likes to go to people and smile at them. so he walks up to this one lady cuz she was waving at him and the lady sitting next to her as i was walkin away with my son she looks at her teenage son and says" now thats just sad" now when i heard this i turned around cuz i was angry and i was about to say something to her but she seen me turn around and her and her son started walkin off. now what am i supposed to do in these situations? i know what i want to do is be like" do u realize that ur judging a 16 month old child?" . or even better yet just plain out say"for ur information my son is very well taken care of. hes on a vegetarian diet which is not only good for his health but also our enviroment. hes only had a cold once in his life. we feed him organic food on the regular to make sure he doesnt get any harmful pesticides. he has a mother and a father and best of all he loves everyone and everyone whose smart enough to know it loves him too. and oh by the way since ur obviously ignorant to any other lifestyle then the one you live people who have dreads do wash them" thats what i want to say. but i just dont know how to go about this. i mean i know from my expierence that eople harshly judge us but its alot more personal when they judge my son. then i just get pissed. i mean ask me question dont just think im neglecting him. he looks so cute in them and he loves to shake his dreads so i dont want to cut them either. im kinda glad she ran away before i could stop her cuz i was really pissed off so i want to plan my next commback .any advice?
updated by @hippie-mama: 02/14/15 03:31:49AM
people judging me as a mother and my son
i replied to your blog post but i know your upset and looking for answers, so ill tell ya what i think..laughter... laugh at theyre ignorance, dont show your upset show that you think its funny how stupid and judgmentsal they are..let guage see them as a joke...fools.. not as hatefull mean people ..instead just stupid silly worthy of pity not anger
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo J.D. said:
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
i think he is the luckiest kid in the world!!!!!! i wish my parents would have given me dreads when i was a baby!! and fed me a veggy diet~!!!
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
thank you guys for your support. i think i just wanted somone besides my hubby to support me. like was said diffrences are ment to be embraced not ostrasized
come to next years garthering camp at kid villiage youll meet alotta kids with dreads who will support ya
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
I think most people who like to make drama are having a proble with you "imposing" your lifetyle onto a young child. Its none of their business but like I said people like that are looking for a reason to be upset.But its not like your tattooing the kid. If he decides he doesnt want dreads when he gets a little older, which is perfectly fine, he can just cut them out. Its really no different than any hairstyle you give a young child. What if you kept your kids hair buzzed as a kid. No one would say anthing about that. Then if he grew up and decided he wanted long hair he could just grow it out.Like I said I think the only potential moral issue in any case like this is imposing beliefs on the inncocent. I dont think that is true in this case. I think that as long as you are fully open to the possibility that he wants to cut them out then its all good.
ive seen kids that young with mohawksat least dreads have meaning and can have religios significance
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1
In my town almost every little boy has a mohawk. And at first I'm sure everyone thought it was awful that someone would do that do a child. (even though it's just hair)as a mother I can feel your pain, if anyone makes your child even frown you wanna jump on them and rip out their eyes. I think what SE said is really good advice, to teach your little one to laugh at it. rather than be upset by it.We walk the mall quite often because we live right by it and its nice to take the baby for a walk. And I've noticed that anytime I go with my husband we get half the dirty looks from old ladies, then when it's just me and fallon.People just make too many assumptions. If I'm alone with the baby, ppl assume I'm a dreaded, heavily tattooed single mother. Actually one day at the Doctors office, fallon started crying and I comforted her as any mother would, and an old lady told the dr that she was surprised how "good" I was with the baby. Kind of insulting I thought. i mean she's my baby of course I would comfort her. But anyways, I'm babbling now, I think that what you should do, is teach gauge to laugh it off, and just know that you are a great mother for allowing such individuality in a child. Kudos to your awesome parenting! soaringeagle said:
ive seen kids that young with mohawks
at least dreads have meaning and can have religios significance
Awww! Just looked at the pics of him and couldn't help but smile.I believe that anger is the last thing you should have in that kind of situation. Like SE said, laughter is the best way to handle it. Realize that their ignorance is humorous. People will always find a reason to criticize others, dreads or not. Instead of being upset that some people don't accept your lifestyle try accepting that other people have different opinions than your own.Later down the road she may find herself talking to someone about it and that person may see her ignorance and point it out. Who knows, maybe seeing your kid could have put the idea into her teen sons head to get dreads(no pun intended =p). Things happen for a reason and even negative situations can have a positive impact.
