Love your dreads and they will love you back!

Hey people! I just want to say that if you really want dreads, you have to know that you want crazy messy hair that does what it wants when it wants. No matter the method you use or how you "maintain" them, your dreads will lock up how they want and you don't have much control over it at all. Trust that if you just love them they WILL love you back!

It is a beautiful thing! I often see people posting about how they think their hair looks "bad" or it "isn't locking" and worry if they are "doing it wrong"... If you stop brushing and wait long enough, they will become dreads. Keep them clean and separate if needed and let them go, it feels sooo freeing. That is all. They will lock up, in time, maybe not all at the same time. They will look like dreads someday. I promise.

You don't have to twist or backcomb or crochet, but if you have, it's ok. Let them be and they will please you! I am almost 8 months into my journey and I won't lie, I had concerns. My dreads aren't yet mature, but I can see them well on their way. The best part is, moreso now that I've left them alone to do their thang. The less you worry, the more suprises you get the next time you think to check 'em out.

It's ok to wash whenever you feel the need, it's ok to separate if they start clinging together, it's ok to have loose roots and bumps and loops, they will lock up, they really will. They will look kind of crazy for some time, but they will turn to dreads, these are all good things.

It's ok to put beads on whenever you want, to take them off, just if they are long beads make sure you move them occasionally to prevent mildew. (Lavendar also prevents mildew spores so it doesn't hurt to add a few drops to your wash).

You can wrap and unwrap them, but if you want a long-lasting dread wrap, maybe wait until they mature. You will know they've matured when there isn't much change happening any longer. This can take up to a year or more if your hair isn't coarse.

It's ok to hear people saying ignorant things, you don't look like everyone else if you have dreads and that is OK. It is allright to educate them or let them be. You aren't everyone else and they don't have to approve. I hope this helps alleviate some concerns even a little if at all. Love your dreads, don't let anyone stop you, they will love you back!

updated by @crystal-o: 04/22/19 05:14:03AM

i knew from the title i was gonna feature this but decided to read it 1st to be sure it was feature worthy, i got maybe 3/4 into the 1st paragraph when i found myself clicking feature and by the end i was sure it was the right thing to do so had to click both likes, i hope 2 likes makes a love

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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

Awww thank you! You and this site are the reason I got through my first couple months with little to no fear. From then on out it's pretty much been well this is it, no turning back and I love it! I just hope everyone else can find some peace through their journey and not let it cause them stress. It is the most enjoyable and freeing decision I've made. It can be easy! <3

totally agree! i'm only a month in but i'm not worried like i was when i first put them in. everyday i'm excited to see how they turn out.

Thank you Crystal. It's been a month since I've brushed my hair. It just looks like a messy mop. No dreads or anything resembling them yet. I am learning patience, lol! I need to read this often.

i totally agree, crystal. it took me a good 5 - 6 months to really relinquish control over my hair and not worry about every little thing thats happening or not happening. some get it from the beginning and others(like me) don't like not having control but thats when patience comes into play. my hair is doing some weird things lately but i just remind myself that its all a part of the journey and i need to just embrace it. that and avoid mirrors at all costs:)

This is wonderfully inspirational. Thank you I am four months deep.. and needed to read this

I love this its really inspiring. I've always been so nit picky with my hair. making sure that each hair is perfectly placed but more lately i've just felt like i need to let my hair down so although i was going to do my dreads naturally i wasn't that patient so i dreaded my hair yesterday afternoon and i'm already in love and i can't wait to see them progress and do their "thang" thanks for your inspiring forum.

beautiful post!!!

Thanks for this, as a newbie only 9 days in, this is very reinforcing and inspirational! I'm sure along my journey I may come back a read this over a few times in the future Thanks!