Dreads and prejudices close to home

How do you all deal with them? I am sure it's much easier to ignore a stranger or explain to them about your hair and whatnot, but what about when the prejudice and ignorance hits closer to home? My mother-in-law [who is African American] seems to think that dreadlocks "are a race thing" and not for "white people." There are other people around me obviously who aren't white [I don't know what terms you guys use, it all doesn't matter to me so I'm using what I grew up with and please don't fuss about it, I'm saying this bc I know some people who do] and haven't said much negative. But my MIL will have some attitude about it, even if she won't out-right say that she doesn't think I should dread my hair, and it bothers me. It's hard to escape, if you know what I mean. I think dreadlocks are beautiful no matter what your race or ethnicity or what kind of hair you have. I don't think she knows I'm a pagan, and I don't think she would understand the connection between my religion and my hair, but it might help....

How do you deal with stereotypes and prejudices by people you are around all the time?

updated by @heathen-hippie-o: 01/13/15 09:08:20PM

i dont even bother trying to explain it i just shake my head in pity and ignore the subect altogether

would jt realy help to explain?

predjudices are ingrained to the core to change that conditioning will take deprogramming the brainwashing which is noble if you undertake that endeavour but its a hell of alot of work i mean your going to be chipping away at a mountain of opions for years before you make much headway

if you try good luck eventualy it will make a difference but it really will take the skills of a deprogrammer to rease all the negative stereotypes and preconceived notions of what dreadlocks are suposed to mean

i think its easier to just live by example ..shine and be the best you you can be and hope thats enough for her to see past herown nwegative perceptions

its easier to just be you then it is to explain you to someone whos already made uup their minds about what your all about based on how you wear yoir hair

--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

i think soaring eagle is definitely right. i deal with almost the exact same thing quite regularly. my husband is jamaican and his family is all back home and think most americans are crazy anyway (LOL) so they dont really care but I deal with a lot of flak from people in my neighborhood and other people in our little community that all my other friends know. i know who is real and dont really care what other people say anymore because i know that if i didnt do anything personal or vindictive to them to make them treat me badly that it is their personal issue. whether someone acts hostile because you remind them of someone else or because they make judgements about you without knowing you all adds up to the same thing... they are being just as prejudiced and judgemental based on outward appearances as they might accuse other people of being.

within our local community the most stress i get directed towards me seems to be from the single AA women. my husband says it is because they arent happy with their own lives and i can see his point but it doesnt make it any more easy to deal with. they are basically shooting themselves in the foot though because i am a good friend to have so i dont worry about how miserable they want to make themselves comparing themselves to me or wondering why my husband chose a native with dreadlocks instead of one of them. theyre making themselves look really bad to anyone who is paying attention also when they see these females treating people badly because of their own anger. each individual person has their own issues to deal with, its how you handle them and whether you can move forward in a positive manner no matter who is against you that shows your own strength.

you are going to experience this whether you have dreads or not brother.. i will go ahead and assume that people have in the past treated you with disdain before you had dreads? and they will when you do.. people like to live in ignorance because its more comfortable than the truth any matter, also people like to bath in pride.. the only thing you can do brother is continue your journey and be grateful that you dont have that noose around your neck.. look back 10 years from now and observe that the same people who treated you with contempt are the same people that have not grown at all.. it takes work to grow and understand other people and most people would rather hit the snooze button on the alarm clock of tolerance and empathy and go back to sleep than WAKE UP! continue walking down your path and admire the scenery along the way.. even if it is cold, desolate, and ugly, because its something to be grateful for.. ONeLOVe

Sister ... lol. But yeah. They have. Whether it's because i didn't give my child solids until he was a year or because I hate OB/GYNs now... or because I want dreadlocks in my hair... I've been treated with disdain. I like what you said, it takes work to grown and understand other people. It makes a lot of sense. I feel like I have grown in that even though it's hard to deal with sometimes, I do MY OWN thing and don't worry about what others are doing. I don't even bother being friends with mutual friends IRL, I find my own friends. Do my own thing. Do my own hair! haha. And it's not just hair. I'm sure many will agree it is a way of life, a spirituality.

Adam Jaymes Robinson said:

you are going to experience this whether you have dreads or not brother.. i will go ahead and assume that people have in the past treated you with disdain before you had dreads? and they will when you do.. people like to live in ignorance because its more comfortable than the truth any matter, also people like to bath in pride.. the only thing you can do brother is continue your journey and be grateful that you dont have that noose around your neck.. look back 10 years from now and observe that the same people who treated you with contempt are the same people that have not grown at all.. it takes work to grow and understand other people and most people would rather hit the snooze button on the alarm clock of tolerance and empathy and go back to sleep than WAKE UP! continue walking down your path and admire the scenery along the way.. even if it is cold, desolate, and ugly, because its something to be grateful for.. ONeLOVe