UNCHARACTERISTIC RANT

I have been on this site for nearly a year. I came here naive about some things , but ready to learn and grow. I soon found that besides knowledge, I needed a few things to get started...BS, ACV, maybe Dr.Bronners...and a wool TAM. I started making tams for myself, I mean, I needed them! Soon, I had people asking me right and left to make them one too. It was flattering and I truly enjoyed it. After awhile, I had people friending me with the sole intention of buying one of my tams. Basically, for me it was all a labor of love. From the beginning, I decided to use good quality wool (because not all yarns are created equal!), and I wanted to be fair...I wasn't trying to get rich. I set a price of $25, which included shipping (which runs about $5 to most places). So that left me $20. If I didn't have a color I needed, I headed to the store...infact, I did this quite often! And found that most of the time I ended up with a $10 profit for the entire day it takes me to craft a custom tam...not a problem. I still wanted to make tams and I still thought it was a way to make people feel good. But soon, I started getting orders where I made the tam and spent the time and money and never heard from the person ever again...which left me with a tam (which I already have plenty of!!!). Or, there were members, who through mutual agreement worked out a trade or were out of the country and we had to figure in postage so they agreed to pay me after I mailed their tam...regardless, I don't understand how a site full of soooo many people giving out vitrtual hugs and blessings and talking about peace, love and spirituality can be so flakey and irresponsible! I have been burned to the point that I am only ashes!!! I am losing the desire to create anything. I am sad and feel used and disillusioned. Maybe, it is my own fault, atleast in part. But I thought I was doing something good and that would be appreciated...apparently not. Soaring Eagle asked me to start a shop to sell my tams and I really don't think I care to. I have always felt like an active, solid part of this community...but, now I have begun to wonder what kind of community this really is. I have made alot of friends here, and I certainly don't mean to imply that everyone is untrustworthy...but, there are those amoung you and you know who you are that should be ashamed at the way you treat other people.
updated by @panterra-caraway: 02/15/15 08:33:30AM

oh panterra hugs

how much were u screwed for?

im broke at the momment but next couple weeks can help u out and wouldnt mind a tam too

but i do think u should set up a shop thyed be paid up front on order

i'll help u set up too

--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

Thank you so much Soaring Eagle<3 At the moment, I am out about $100. The thing that is killing me is not the money...it is about honor and integrity...something I know you understand because of your standards here. I need to give the shop thing some more thought. But, I do truly appreciate your offer to help (in every way).You are a good man...Hugs back. I just need to lick my wounds for a bit I guess...I am sure you understand that too. Thank you again

unfortunately your not the only one. i've shared some of my tams in the past out of kindness and most have been super appreciative but i've also sent a couple as trades and never received anything. oh well. what do you do. it's a chance we take when we don't really know the people on here. i would suggest opening an etsy shop. it does cost a bit in listing fees(.20 cents each) and about 3.5 percent of the sales but at least you'll know they're going to pay you. {{hugs}}

I apologize for your experience. I think setting up a shop would be a good idea so that way this doesn't happen again. If I hadn't spent $60 on a "wool" tam from some random site a couple of months ago I would have definitely purchased one from you! -Marcus

Awww Pantera, <3 ((((HUGS)))) I love chatting w/ you for you not your tams, tho you do make amazing ones and I"m so sorry to hear you've been jipped Tams take a lot of time to make (at least for me) and wool yarn is expensive for sure! I am so sorry to hear you've been burned, and I hope it all works out! I would totally offer to help you purchase some wool and what not but I'm just in no means to do so, having to borrow money to make ends meet here at the moment If you ever need anything that I can help with for real shoot me a message!!!!

I completely understand where you're coming from Panterra! It's an unfortunate reality for us handcrafting mama's. I have begun the policy of not even starting a custom clothing order for someone until I receive 1/2 payment upfront. That way I can buy the materials and not be out any $$ if the customer doesn't pay me in the end. I then make their item and send a pic if I do not receive the remaining payment they do not get their order and I can hopefully sell it to someone else. It's a little different with tams because the price is lower so I would always ask for the payment upfront. I also think you should sell the stock you have right now and maybe not take any more custom orders until you do. Set up your shop here on DLS. It's not about the money, I understand that, it's a lack of respect for the hard work & love we put into every creation! I do believe that it's not usually intentional nonetheless it's rude!! I'm sure some people believe my policies to be a bit harsh but I'd probably go broke if I did it any other way! (((H*U*G*S))) & Much Love

Wow everyone! I guess my rant really needed to be posted then because the problem is even worst than I thought! I am so sorry you have been treated so badly too. I just don't understand people sometimes. I would never treat someone with such thoughtlessness and disrespect. What makes me feel good though is that some of the kindest people on the site have replied...Heather, Shanxon, Biz, NaturalWomyn...and this lovely soul Shang Tsung...thank you for giving me that support when I am feeling alone and sad. I will take your words in and hopefully will feel wellenough to maybe continue with my tams. I wish we could all sit down together and create and talk and laugh...because you all understand the love and intent behind that process. Sending love to each of you...and thanks again <3

Awww a crafting circle would be amazing! Wish we all weren't so far away *sniffles*

Sorry to hear that...sucks. I didn't have too much luck with trading my tams either and selling would be pointless due to shipping charge to USA.

I also payed for some bracelets that I never received..

Hope you can at least still find the joy in making some cool tams for yourself =)