family says ill have to take dreads out sometime...

so i absolutely love my dreadlocks. they are 3 months in and doing good....but my grandma..who i live with, is telling me that i should backcomb or twist and rip to make them and enjoy them until i have to get a job, then take em out.....she says that you have to "do" something to them, that its more than just not brushing your hair. i tell her that i want to keep them, and i don't want to take them out, or "make" them. her response is either, well how are you going to get a job, or life changes and something is going to happen where you can't have them anymore, and you would've wasted time, when they don't even "look" like dreads....it isn't discouraging me, kinda pissin me off actually. i don't think my hair should hold me back from doing anything in life, and it seems ridiculous that someone would think that. i don't really know what to do here..i know im not taking them out, and i know im not backcombing, so how do i get her off my back..how do i explain to her, that i am passionate about this, that i am becoming attatched to my locs, who are starting to get names lol, and im watching them grow..i don't want to "make" them, its soooo much more intriguing to watch them form. my grandmother is smart and stubborn, and believes herself to always be right.....maybe there is nothing i can do....and she won't shave my head...but, idk man..thoughts?
updated by @julie-ellis: 02/14/15 07:40:25AM

u will get that i got that all along toojust smile and say well we will see in 40 years if i still have em im right but if they get cut in 10 then you have my permission to say i told tyou so


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

I guess it depends on the type of job you want and how far along getting a job is for you.

I mean, most employers might be slightly discouraged by your locks. But if you're overqualified for the position then who cares? You will be judged on how you look always, but its nothing impossible to overcome! Don't let that bring you down, just be happy with who ya are!

i have goals, and i have plans for life. i know i will make it all costs, and i know it isn't impossible. i just find it odd that she supports it, but says i still have to get rid of them. i plan to get a job when i turn 18 in early august, and just save for a car. then ill go to school and blah blah. thanks for the words..im glad i have complete support out there somewhere.

we have a member here who is brilliant hes got 6 or 8 year old natural dreads and is a rocket scientist with phd soon to be working for nasa (or is now) nomatter what yiur goals dreads dont need to hold uback unless u let them

Julie Ellis said:

i have goals, and i have plans for life. i know i will make it all costs, and i know it isn't impossible. i just find it odd that she supports it, but says i still have to get rid of them. i plan to get a job when i turn 18 in early august, and just save for a car. then ill go to school and blah blah. thanks for the words..im glad i have complete support out there somewhere.

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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

just get a job and show hermay be she ll keep quiet then

yeah my grandmother keeps telling me to go get my dreads "done" she doesn't understand the process and thinks it's just like any other hair style you can go to a salon and get which she's partially correct but it is kinda saddening. You will be just fine there are plenty of jobs where u can tie them back or put them in a hat and you'll be just fine! I am going to school for teaching early childhood at the moment then going back for k-8 and I'm going to have issues because of my tattoos but the good news is I know they will still hire me with dreads cause my art teacher when I was little had them :P Just make them look past your looks!

start your own business and hire your grandma to sweep the floors and clean the tiolets haha


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My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

dont worry about it...u cant make old people think what u want, u cant ever make them admit they r wrong...all u can do is get on with life and ignore them...they grew up in a different society, different world, they dont understand ours.i know it sucks, but all u can do is change your attitude, cant ever change hers...there are many kinds of jobs and in a free society nobody should make you change your hairstyle. some still try, but u can always focus on a field where they dont...

she may come round to your way of thinking but if not move on and love your locs,IMO dreading up is a sign of a maturing mind. letting go of all the constraints of society and family.i honestly delayed my own for years cos my dad was very vocal about how crap they are in general, but after i got mine he said some people can get away with them and i'm one of them and it was the neatest my hair had been in years ,fark and i waited soooooooooo long.lol.on the other hand mum hasnt said a word about them, she hasnt got anything good to say so she dont no friction just avoids the topicand anyone that wont employ you cos your hair is destined for the scrap heap themselves, only progressive companies prosper.