No Loops, No Kinks...Thinking About Giving Up

I know I am not that far in...only heading to four monthes. But, I am getting real discouraged. I have skinny little sections everywhere but not real knots in my opinion. My hair gets puffy and frizzy, a massive tumbleweed really but knots...no. I have kept my hands out of it and slept on a sweater. I wear a tam, even in 113 degree heat. I use BS, or Maylees or Bronners...I have gone pure neglect but I don't think my hair is getting the message. I have used sea salt spray several times a week and refrained from haircolor, only touching up twice. I have nothing that to my eye looks like dreadlocks. I have been a cheerleader for this process, but I think I am beat.
updated by @panterra-caraway: 02/14/15 06:37:12AM

hmm thats odd well theres no shame in doin lil twist and rip to get em startedbut ..how are yu drying//it could be the drying thats screwing u


--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

SE, I just scoop it up in a towel when wet and after a few minutes take it out and let it just sit and dry. The hair on the lower half of my head (down by my neck) feels slick and soft. I don't use any oils. Even ACV makes it feel slicker so I don't use it. Our water is very hard.
soaringeagle said:

hmm thats odd well theres no shame in doin lil twist and rip to get em started
but ..how are yu drying//
it could be the drying thats screwing u

panterra, hang in there, i know your a strong person, it will really start to pick up soon, im sure of it, my hair has all sectioned itself, but i to look at myself and dont have dreads yet, but at the same time, dont expect to, but i know it will really start to go wild here in the next few months, and i will have the dreads i so want, but you just got to give it some more time, or you can twist and rip, but i really hope you can stick in there, and besides whats give up mean, to start to brush again, idk about you, but i really dont miss brushing my hair, well i got so much hair it was like a chore to brush lol, so maybe thats why i dont miss it......

keep going for dreads, hang in there.just out of curiousity what is the best way to dry, i've been shaking my head to kinda whiplash the water out, then i squeeze a lot of hair from root to tip then smaller parts and then with a towel the same thing. then blow dry till it's just a tiny bit wet and that air drys.... but yesterday i think i might rubbed my hair to hard in the shower with the shampoo and idk it looks a little less knotty but it's going back now so.... yeah what's the right way to dry.

soaringeagle said:

hmm thats odd well theres no shame in doin lil twist and rip to get em started
but ..how are yu drying//
it could be the drying thats screwing u

I gave up on my natural process after a year of nothing and back-combed (half of my hair) gently. It worked wonders for me and I don't regret it a bit. Think about what you really want and what would make you feel the best. Going patience feels great when you get there, but at the same time how much anxiety and frustration is waiting causing you?This process is about you! It should not be painful and disheartening. Think about it. Do what you want, and love your choices for what they are and learn from them. Learn and love your mistakes even more. If you can do these things you have nothing to lose by being purely yourself, even if you make compulsive decisions and doubt them afterwards.It's been my experience that my mistakes and impulses have given me more character then anything I was really logical about. If that's the case then what do any of us have to lose by doing whatever comes to mind?not trying to play devils advocate, but I just feel like this has so much to do with you that you should not feel poorly about changing your mind at all. You can always change it back, and may be better for the experimenting,

Thank you everybody! I think I am going to try alittle back combing and see if it helps anything and I think I might also start using the pantyhose over my hair when I shampoo. I am going to aim for going with my natural sectioning as it is and see if the backcombing will help give me a foundation. Hopefully, it will give my hair alittle nudge. Thank you for your love and kind words, your help and encouragement means everything to me.

i dont use a towl, or blow dryer when i can help iti just shake my head out then air/drip dryno rubbin no squeezin i will sit in the sun or by a fan tho


--
My new book Ban The Taboo Vol 1

I'm in my seventh month and still not dreaded everywhere.Everyones hair is different and will dread at different speeds. Remember it is not a race and id it takes a year its all good. If you throw in the towel the year will still go by and you still won't have dreads, if you hang in it will happen. You can always kick start them like suggested.One Love

I believe this is what it means to live in your true nature. You act as you feel (without intending harm to yourself or others) and you love every moment and every thing no matter what the outcome. Consistent logical can be reserved for automatons.

What Ive learned from this site (and especially SE) is as sure as we age, is as sure as hair will loc (eventually). Some show signs of aging slower than others (people and locs) and I guess thats a matter of genetics and experience (karmic action/reaction). Who cares about getting locs? Its easier when you dont care about it or focus on it but its hard to remember that. I guess at the end of the day (or year in this case), they show up when youre not looking for them.
Lex has many valid points. Words to live by even. I find myself reminded why Im on the natural path: I dont need locs. I feel its silly for me to even believe I need them in the first place (I thought I really wanted them before I found this site).

I dont know what the future holds (I may section or twist them if I feel so inclined) but I do know that I dont care whether I get locs (although Im told they will happen fairly easily based on my genetics now that Ive put down the comb). I also know that its best to forget about what makes us upset and focus on what makes us happy (like talking to great people on dreadlocks site).




Lex said:

I gave up on my natural process after a year of nothing and back-combed (half of my hair) gently. It worked wonders for me and I don't regret it a bit. Think about what you really want and what would make you feel the best. Going patience feels great when you get there, but at the same time how much anxiety and frustration is waiting causing you?

This process is about you! It should not be painful and disheartening. Think about it. Do what you want, and love your choices for what they are and learn from them. Learn and love your mistakes even more. If you can do these things you have nothing to lose by being purely yourself, even if you make compulsive decisions and doubt them afterwards.

It's been my experience that my mistakes and impulses have given me more character then anything I was really logical about. If that's the case then what do any of us have to lose by doing whatever comes to mind?

not trying to play devils advocate, but I just feel like this has so much to do with you that you should not feel poorly about changing your mind at all. You can always change it back, and may be better for the experimenting,